# A funny Russian joke **URL:** \ **Category:** PittSpeed Off Topic\ **Created:** [October 28, 2008, 6:05pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/a-funny-russian-joke/200390 "2008-10-28T18:05:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![ShalerPunk](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/shalerpunk/32/5976_2.png) [@ShalerPunk](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/ShalerPunk)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2008, 6:05pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/a-funny-russian-joke/200390/1 "2008-10-28T18:05:46Z")
A Communist died and since he was a honest man albeit atheist, he was sentenced to rotate spending one year in Hell and one year in Heaven. One year passed and Satan said to God : “Take this man as fast as possible, because he turned all my young demons into Young Communists, I have to restore some order.” Another year passed, Satan meets God again and tells him : “Lord God, it’s my turn now.” God replied : “First of all, don’t call me Lord God, but instead Comrade God; second, there is no God; and one more thing - don’t distract me or I’ll be late to the Party meeting.” **make that two** A Russian and an American are sentenced to Hell. The Devil summons them and says: “Guys, you have 2 options: an American or Russian hell. In the American one you can do what you want, but you’ll have to eat a bucket of shit every morning. The Russian one is the same, but it’s 2 buckets.” The Yankee quickly makes up his mind and goes to American Hell, while the Russian eventually chooses the Russian one. In a week or so they meet. The Russian asks: “So, what’s it like out there?”/ “Exactly what the devil said, the Hell itself is OK, but eating a bucket of shit is killing me. And you?” / “Ah, it feels like home - either the shit was not delivered or there aren’t enough buckets for everyone!” ---
**Author:** ![fshowcars](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/fshowcars/32/5937_2.png) [@fshowcars](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/fshowcars)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2008, 4:43am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/a-funny-russian-joke/200390/2 "2008-10-29T04:43:05Z")
awesome jokes and great sense of humor. :ugh: ---
**Author:** ![dyingwish](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/dyingwish/32/6041_2.png) [@dyingwish](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/dyingwish)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2008, 4:49am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/a-funny-russian-joke/200390/3 "2008-10-29T04:49:00Z")
must take a shitload of vodak to make those funny ---
**Author:** ![1320](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/1320/32/5949_2.png) [@1320](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/1320)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2008, 5:15am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/a-funny-russian-joke/200390/4 "2008-10-29T05:15:30Z")
Those were pretty much the worst jokes I’ve ever heard. ---
**Author:** ![Darkstar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@Darkstar](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Darkstar)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2008, 5:48am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/a-funny-russian-joke/200390/5 "2008-10-29T05:48:36Z")
> [@my car is on a T-shirt?WTF](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/my-car-is-on-a-t-shirt-wtf/38474/16): > > Those were pretty much the worst jokes I’ve ever heard. IN SOVIET RUSSIA, JOKE LAUGHS AT YOU!!! ---
**Author:** ![ShalerPunk](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/shalerpunk/32/5976_2.png) [@ShalerPunk](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/ShalerPunk)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2008, 7:47am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/a-funny-russian-joke/200390/6 "2008-10-29T07:47:02Z")
> [@FS: '03 Lexus GS430](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/fs-03-lexus-gs430/38490/3): > > IN SOVIET RUSSIA, JOKE LAUGHS AT YOU!!! 🤣 ---
**Author:** ![tegSimple](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d6d6ee/32.png) [@tegSimple](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/tegSimple)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2008, 8:44am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/a-funny-russian-joke/200390/7 "2008-10-29T08:44:16Z")
really…bad…jokes ---
**Author:** ![ShalerPunk](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/shalerpunk/32/5976_2.png) [@ShalerPunk](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/ShalerPunk)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2008, 8:48am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/a-funny-russian-joke/200390/8 "2008-10-29T08:48:12Z")
They were funnier on medicine last night. ---
**Author:** ![SmokinDiesel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/57b2e6/32.png) [@SmokinDiesel](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/SmokinDiesel)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2008, 6:35pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/a-funny-russian-joke/200390/9 "2008-10-29T18:35:31Z")
> [@my car is on a T-shirt?WTF](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/my-car-is-on-a-t-shirt-wtf/38474/16): > > Those were pretty much the worst jokes I’ve ever heard. ---
**Author:** ![imported\_gearhead](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/imported_gearhead/32/5957_2.png) [@imported\_gearhead](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/imported_gearhead)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2008, 6:41pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/a-funny-russian-joke/200390/10 "2008-10-29T18:41:14Z")
I lol’d at teh second one 🙂