# Beer/Vagina showdown **URL:** \ **Category:** NYSpeed Off Topic\ **Created:** [December 16, 2005, 10:29am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/beer-vagina-showdown/5791 "2005-12-16T10:29:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![RedDawg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/dfb087/32.png) [@RedDawg](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/RedDawg)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2005, 10:29am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/beer-vagina-showdown/5791/1 "2005-12-16T10:29:50Z")
1. Beer is always wet. Vagina needs a little work. One point to BEER 2. Warm beer tastes awful. One point to VAGINA 3. A really cold beer is satisfying. One point to BEER 4. If after taking a swig of your favorite beer you find a hair between your teeth, you may vomit. One point to VAGINA 5. If you get home reeking of beer your wife may get mad, make a scene, kick you out, etc. If you get home reeking of vagina your wife may get mad, kick you out, even leave you. There’s definitely a point to be had here, depending on your point of view and personal circumstances. I’ll just call it a DRAW for the time being. 6. Ten beers in one night and you can’t drive home. Ten vaginas in one night and you don’t want to drive anywhere. One point to VAGINA 7. If you have a lot of beer in a public place, your reputation may suffer. If you eat any vagina in public, you become a legend. One point to VAGINA 8. If a cop stops you and you smell of beer you may get arrested. If you smell of vagina he may buy you a beer. One point to VAGINA 9. You normally don’t find old beer. One point to BEER 10. Too much beer and you’ll think you see flying saucers. Too much vagina and you’ll think you’ve seen God. One point to VAGINA 11. Ripping off a beer bottle label is boring. Ripping off panties is fun. One point to VAGINA 12. In most countries there’s a tax on beer. One point to VAGINA 13. If you have another beer the first one never gets pissed off. One point to BEER 14. You can always be sure if you’re the first one to open a bottle or a can. One point to BEER 15. If you shake beer it’ll get all agitated but eventually it settles down. One point to BEER 16. With beer you always have choice: clear, dark, pilsner, ale, lager, etc. One point to BEER 17. You always know how much beer is going to cost. One point to BEER 18. Beer doesn’t have a mother. One point to BEER 19. Beer never expects to be hugged for half an hour after you drink it. One point to BEER FINAL SCORE: BEER: 10 VAGINA: 8 That’s it! The matter is settled, the clear winner is: BEER PS: If you are a woman and at this point feel angry, degraded or discriminated against, just remember that Beer would experience none of those feelings, let alone express them. An extra point for BEER! Not saying i agree, vagina \> beer IMO just thought it was funny ---
**Author:** ![j\_espo1](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/j_espo1/32/7291_2.png) [@j\_espo1](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/j_espo1)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2005, 10:38am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/beer-vagina-showdown/5791/2 "2005-12-16T10:38:24Z")
:tup: good stuff. ---
**Author:** ![Zer0DazE](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/zer0daze/32/7624_2.png) [@Zer0DazE](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Zer0DazE)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2005, 10:38am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/beer-vagina-showdown/5791/3 "2005-12-16T10:38:53Z")
> [@RedDawg](#): > > Not saying i agree, vagina \> beer IMO just thought it was funny you are obviously young, or dont get laid a lot. ---
**Author:** ![Janny](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/janny/32/7594_2.png) [@Janny](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Janny)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2005, 10:38am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/beer-vagina-showdown/5791/4 "2005-12-16T10:38:56Z")
they’re both great. I’ll add two for vagina and then they’ll be even. 1. You can’t put your dick in a beer can. One point to VAGINA 2. Human life doesn’t come out of beer bottles, cans or kegs. One point to VAGINA there. 10-10. perfect. ---
**Author:** ![Zer0DazE](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/zer0daze/32/7624_2.png) [@Zer0DazE](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Zer0DazE)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2005, 10:40am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/beer-vagina-showdown/5791/5 "2005-12-16T10:40:25Z")
> [@Janny](#): > > 1. Human life doesn’t come out of beer bottles, cans or kegs. > One point to VAGINA i beg to differ. i am sure there are a few kids on this forum who wouldnt exist if it werent for beer. beer gives life ---
**Author:** ![tpgsr](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/tpgsr/32/7374_2.png) [@tpgsr](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/tpgsr)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2005, 10:40am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/beer-vagina-showdown/5791/6 "2005-12-16T10:40:53Z")
> [@Janny](#): > > they’re both great. > 21. Human life doesn’t come out of beer bottles, cans or kegs. > One point to VAGINA But bottles, cans, and kegs lead to a lot of new unexpected human life -2 Points BEER Edit: Damn you beat me to it ---
**Author:** ![RedDawg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/dfb087/32.png) [@RedDawg](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/RedDawg)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2005, 11:02am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/beer-vagina-showdown/5791/7 "2005-12-16T11:02:14Z")
> [@Zer0DazE](#): > > you are obviously young, or dont get laid a lot. 14, and i touched my first boob last week so IN YOUR FACE!!! ---
**Author:** ![ly555is](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3bc359/32.png) [@ly555is](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/ly555is)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2005, 11:08am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/beer-vagina-showdown/5791/8 "2005-12-16T11:08:28Z")
i dunno jan. usually when i’m in the act i’m not like HEY HUMAN LIFE COMES OUT OF HERE that thought doesn’t get me all psyched about vagina. nor does it make me want a beer. that’s awesome. i swear that is going to go through my head the next time i’m all flagrante delicto and i’ll be like well this concept is just a boner killer all right thanks jan :tup: ---
**Author:** ![Janny](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/janny/32/7594_2.png) [@Janny](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Janny)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2005, 11:42am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/beer-vagina-showdown/5791/9 "2005-12-16T11:42:32Z")
yessss. I love ruining other peoples’ sexual experiences. ---
**Author:** ![Skurge](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/skurge/32/7285_2.png) [@Skurge](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Skurge)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2005, 2:33pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/beer-vagina-showdown/5791/10 "2005-12-16T14:33:25Z")
I guess it all depends on the vagina in question… ---
**Author:** ![soopa7fly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c77e96/32.png) [@soopa7fly](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/soopa7fly)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2005, 3:04pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/beer-vagina-showdown/5791/11 "2005-12-16T15:04:15Z")
> [@Janny](#): > > 1. Human life doesn’t come out of beer bottles, cans or kegs. > One point to VAGINA if youre a single guy who doesnt want kids, this is one point for BEER ---
**Author:** ![double\_j](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/double_j/32/7380_2.png) [@double\_j](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/double_j)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2005, 5:42pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/beer-vagina-showdown/5791/12 "2005-12-16T17:42:56Z")
> 1. Warm beer tastes awful. > One point to VAGINA not true. really good beer tastes wonderful warm. ---
**Author:** ![Geehee](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/geehee/32/7238_2.png) [@Geehee](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Geehee)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2005, 7:24pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/beer-vagina-showdown/5791/13 "2005-12-16T19:24:27Z")
beer is never not in the mood beer doesnt bleed ---
**Author:** ![Jon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/3bc359/32.png) [@Jon](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Jon)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2005, 8:04pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/beer-vagina-showdown/5791/14 "2005-12-16T20:04:56Z")
Beer wont give you STD’s. ---
**Author:** ![AlbinoMonkeyRat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bb73d2/32.png) [@AlbinoMonkeyRat](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/AlbinoMonkeyRat)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2005, 8:44pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/beer-vagina-showdown/5791/15 "2005-12-16T20:44:18Z")
beer doesn’t have PMS, moods swings or cramps +3 points for beer beer doesn’t mind when you drink her sister +1 for beer ---
**Author:** ![91CRXSI](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/91crxsi/32/7247_2.png) [@91CRXSI](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/91CRXSI)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2005, 10:23pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/beer-vagina-showdown/5791/16 "2005-12-16T22:23:03Z")
a big beer is better then a small one +1 beer you can either take your time with beer or slam it down really fast n it wont care eihter way +1 beer ---
**Author:** ![Janny](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/janny/32/7594_2.png) [@Janny](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Janny)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2005, 12:15am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/beer-vagina-showdown/5791/17 "2005-12-17T00:15:07Z")
okay okay. beer wins. ---
**Author:** ![Bacon](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/bacon/32/7230_2.png) [@Bacon](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Bacon)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2005, 12:40am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/beer-vagina-showdown/5791/18 "2005-12-17T00:40:42Z")
Beer will always win. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![ly555is](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3bc359/32.png) [@ly555is](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/ly555is)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2005, 1:38am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/beer-vagina-showdown/5791/19 "2005-12-17T01:38:27Z")
jan picks beer over vagina choosing alcohol over your girl junk :tup: ---
**Author:** ![Geehee](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/geehee/32/7238_2.png) [@Geehee](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Geehee)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2005, 7:34am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/beer-vagina-showdown/5791/20 "2005-12-17T07:34:30Z")
i always knew jan was a smart one… beer wont lie about you behind your back beer wont talk shit about you then text you for sex [Next page](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/beer-vagina-showdown/5791.md?page=2)