# best man speech: **URL:** \ **Category:** PittSpeed Off Topic\ **Created:** [May 13, 2004, 5:55am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/best-man-speech/166453 "2004-05-13T05:55:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![imported\_SINISTER](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/imported_sinister/32/5970_2.png) [@imported\_SINISTER](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/imported_SINISTER)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2004, 5:55am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/best-man-speech/166453/1 "2004-05-13T05:55:26Z")
ok im the best man of my girls brothers wedding? ive known him for years real good friend of my–untill he met her now i have no problem being in the wedding and all that BS but whator how do i give a best man speech when i absolutly hate his furture wife with a passion hate isnt even a strong enough word for this bish wtf am i suppose to say? ---
**Author:** ![whitey](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/whitey/32/5911_2.png) [@whitey](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/whitey)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2004, 6:04am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/best-man-speech/166453/2 "2004-05-13T06:04:39Z")
get up and say i knew I would be making this toast… so earlier in the day I made some… and pull out two pieces of bread with jelly on the side… and then say congratulations blah blah blah. or watch old school and do it like he does. ---
**Author:** ![ninjenn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c67d28/32.png) [@ninjenn](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/ninjenn)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2004, 6:11am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/best-man-speech/166453/3 "2004-05-13T06:11:48Z")
> [@2FNFast](#): > > ok im the best man of my girls brothers wedding? > ive known him for years real good friend of my–untill he met her > > now i have no problem being in the wedding and all that BS > > but whator how do i give a best man speech when i absolutly hate his furture wife with a passion hate isnt even a strong enough word for this bish > > wtf am i suppose to say? Drink a lot before the speech and then say what you want… apologize profusely afterwards and claim drunkenness. ---
**Author:** ![imported\_SINISTER](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/imported_sinister/32/5970_2.png) [@imported\_SINISTER](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/imported_SINISTER)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2004, 6:18am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/best-man-speech/166453/4 "2004-05-13T06:18:24Z")
> [@huskysgrl](#): > > Drink a lot before the speech and then say what you want… apologize profusely afterwards and claim drunkenness. not helping me out here guys im being seriouse ---
**Author:** ![ninjenn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c67d28/32.png) [@ninjenn](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/ninjenn)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2004, 6:20am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/best-man-speech/166453/5 "2004-05-13T06:20:38Z")
yeah… forgot this was ON-topic… KISS - Keep It Simple Stupid Good luck, many blessings, wish you two the best… simple stuff. Don’t get too in-depth. If other people know that you don’t like her, then you will come off as being fake, unless you keep it simple. Tell her she’s a great girl for him (whether or not you mean it) and leave it at that. ---
**Author:** ![imported\_gearhead](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/imported_gearhead/32/5957_2.png) [@imported\_gearhead](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/imported_gearhead)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2004, 6:22am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/best-man-speech/166453/6 "2004-05-13T06:22:06Z")
[http://www.thebestmanspeech.com/](http://www.thebestmanspeech.com/) > **[Toast Examples for Best Man Speeches - Confetti.co.uk](https://www.confetti.co.uk/speeches/toast-examples-for-best-man-speeches)** > > A best man’s wedding speech traditionally finishes with a toast to the bride and groom. Putting that into words is easy with these toast examples that you can adapt and use. [http://mag.weddingcentral.com.au/weddings/speeches/](http://mag.weddingcentral.com.au/weddings/speeches/) that should get you at least started. ---
**Author:** ![whitey](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/whitey/32/5911_2.png) [@whitey](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/whitey)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2004, 6:24am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/best-man-speech/166453/7 "2004-05-13T06:24:17Z")
i was being serious… you would provide for some comic relief. and then you can pretty much say good luck and god bless… that type of deal ---
**Author:** ![imported\_SINISTER](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/imported_sinister/32/5970_2.png) [@imported\_SINISTER](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/imported_SINISTER)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2004, 6:26am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/best-man-speech/166453/8 "2004-05-13T06:26:43Z")
> [@whitey](#): > > i was being serious… you would provide for some comic relief. and then you can pretty much say good luck and god bless… that type of deal no yours was good! thinking about it but dunno how im gonna be able to keep a peanutbutter and jelly sandwhich in my pocket of a tux in a wedding in july!! ---
**Author:** ![Pewter](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/pewter/32/5936_2.png) [@Pewter](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Pewter)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2004, 6:38am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/best-man-speech/166453/9 "2004-05-13T06:38:53Z")
> [@2FNFast](#): > > no yours was good! > thinking about it > > but dunno how im gonna be able to keep a peanutbutter and jelly sandwhich in my pocket of a tux in a wedding in july!! u’ll eat it first!!! ---
**Author:** ![whitey](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/whitey/32/5911_2.png) [@whitey](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/whitey)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2004, 8:58am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/best-man-speech/166453/10 "2004-05-13T08:58:58Z")
what you do is get like the waiter or something to hold it then bring it up on the platter… have it cut in two so they can share… crust optional ---
**Author:** ![ShalerPunk](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/shalerpunk/32/5976_2.png) [@ShalerPunk](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/ShalerPunk)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2004, 9:04am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/best-man-speech/166453/11 "2004-05-13T09:04:07Z")
Get up. Say “You know, I thought \ had higher standards. (Shrug) Oh well… Salute.” Chug the wine. Sit down. ---
**Author:** ![imported\_SINISTER](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/imported_sinister/32/5970_2.png) [@imported\_SINISTER](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/imported_SINISTER)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2004, 9:04am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/best-man-speech/166453/12 "2004-05-13T09:04:22Z")
> [@whitey](#): > > what you do is get like the waiter or something to hold it then bring it up on the platter… have it cut in two so they can share… crust optional but im on atkins??? ha its an idea ill thijk of it ---
**Author:** ![ninjenn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c67d28/32.png) [@ninjenn](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/ninjenn)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2004, 10:21am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/best-man-speech/166453/13 "2004-05-13T10:21:50Z")
that is a cute idea… 🙂 One peanut butter and jelly sandwich won’t destroy your atkins diet. ---
**Author:** ![Darkstar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@Darkstar](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Darkstar)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2004, 3:43pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/best-man-speech/166453/14 "2004-05-13T15:43:53Z")
On-Topic Resonse: You are there for him, not her. Focus on how well you know him, all the great times you’ve had together growing up blah blah blah, and then wish them the best of luck. Off-Topic Response: Suprise Sex + Donkey Punch = teh win!!!1 ---
**Author:** ![Talonchick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/48db29/32.png) [@Talonchick](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Talonchick)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2004, 7:20pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/best-man-speech/166453/15 "2004-05-13T19:20:42Z")
> [@whitey](#): > > get up and say i knew I would be making this toast… so earlier in the day I made some… and pull out two pieces of bread with jelly on the side… and then say congratulations blah blah blah. > > or watch old school and do it like he does. hahahha that’s so cute. I should do that for my cousin’s wedding…i’m her maid of honor, so i’ll be making a toast as well. 2fnfast: I agree with everyone else, keep it short and sweet, and you’ll be fine ---
**Author:** ![Darkstar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@Darkstar](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Darkstar)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2004, 7:43pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/best-man-speech/166453/16 "2004-05-13T19:43:44Z")
> [@Talonchick](#): > > hahahha that’s so cute. I should do that for my cousin’s wedding…i’m her maid of honor, so i’ll be making a toast as well. > > 2fnfast: I agree with everyone else, keep it short and sweet, and you’ll be fine if my best man toasted bread, and brought it up for his toast, I would kick him in the balls and tell him to leave my wedding. It sucks bad enough that im throwing my life away on a evil worthless female, but for my “best man” to go up and pull shit like that would indeed be cause for an assbeating. Weddings are not a time of celebration, they are a time of supreme sadness for men. Sure, your friends all show up, but its only because of the free booze. This is understood, and accepted by the groom, as he undoubtably has been in the same situation, and free booze is free booze, even if its at the living wake of your good friend. ---
**Author:** ![imported\_SINISTER](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/imported_sinister/32/5970_2.png) [@imported\_SINISTER](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/imported_SINISTER)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2004, 7:45pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/best-man-speech/166453/17 "2004-05-13T19:45:25Z")
> [@Darkstar](#): > > if my best man toasted bread, and brought it up for his toast, I would kick him in the balls and tell him to leave my wedding. It sucks bad enough that im throwing my life away on a evil worthless female, but for my “best man” to go up and pull shit like that would indeed be cause for an assbeating. Weddings are not a time of celebration, they are a time of supreme sadness for men. Sure, your friends all show up, but its only because of the free booze. This is understood, and accepted by the groom, as he undoubtably has been in the same situation, and free booze is free booze, even if its at the living wake of your good friend. :bowrofl: :bowrofl: :bowrofl: :bowrofl: ---
**Author:** ![imported\_Sleeper](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/imported_sleeper/32/5939_2.png) [@imported\_Sleeper](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/imported_Sleeper)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2004, 8:31pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/best-man-speech/166453/18 "2004-05-13T20:31:44Z")
I am happy and honered to be here tonight with these 2 love birds sittting aside me,to my brotheri give you my best wishes and to\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_ i give you this…whip your cock out and swing it in her face and yell out…Who,s the lucky man now bitch huh!..lol no seriously…with these to love birds sitting aside me i wish the best of luck 2 you both and may you get everything in love you saught after,congrats to both of you. :embarass: ---
**Author:** ![rookee](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/rookee/32/5972_2.png) [@rookee](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/rookee)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2004, 8:45am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/best-man-speech/166453/19 "2004-05-14T08:45:32Z")
when i was the best man in my boys wedding & i stole a line from a diamond is forever ad i saw the morning of the wedding… it made half the room cry “I just want to thank you all for coming today to celebrate this special day between “douchebag1” and “douchebag2”. This couple didn’t get married to live together, they got married because they couldn’t live without each other. So lets raise a glass and say congratulations to “tron1” and “tron2”…” insert the obligatory salu if they’re italian ---
**Author:** ![fshowcars](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/fshowcars/32/5937_2.png) [@fshowcars](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/fshowcars)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2004, 8:49am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/best-man-speech/166453/20 "2004-05-14T08:49:26Z")
> [@rookee](#): > > when i was the best man in my boys wedding & i stole a line from a diamond is forever ad i saw the morning of the wedding… it made half the room cry 🤣 🤣 🤣 [Next page](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/best-man-speech/166453.md?page=2)