# lame/hack joke thread??
**URL:** https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lame-hack-joke-thread/52945
**Category:** NYSpeed Off Topic
**Created:** [August 8, 2008, 10:13am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lame-hack-joke-thread/52945 "2008-08-08T10:13:06Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 3
### Author:  [@Paulo](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Paulo)
#### Post date: [August 8, 2008, 11:21am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lame-hack-joke-thread/52945/41 "2008-08-08T11:21:32Z")
What do you call a happy Italian?
A No-mad.
---
### Author:  [@Paulo](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Paulo)
#### Post date: [August 8, 2008, 11:22am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lame-hack-joke-thread/52945/42 "2008-08-08T11:22:56Z")
How many blondes does it take to make chocolate chip cookies?
1. 2 to make the batter, 1 to squeeze the rabbit.
---
### Author:  [@EvilJay](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/EvilJay)
#### Post date: [October 1, 2008, 10:31am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lame-hack-joke-thread/52945/43 "2008-10-01T10:31:07Z")
Finally a perfect smiley for all these lame jokes!!!
:rimshot:
---
### Author:  [@Dr.Stevil](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Dr.Stevil)
#### Post date: [October 1, 2008, 10:32am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lame-hack-joke-thread/52945/44 "2008-10-01T10:32:23Z")
lol good bump
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### Author:  [@SkunkApe](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/SkunkApe)
#### Post date: [October 1, 2008, 10:59am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lame-hack-joke-thread/52945/45 "2008-10-01T10:59:23Z")
> [@EvilJay](#):
>
> Finally a perfect smiley for all these lame jokes!!!
>
> :rimshot:
LAWL
AWESOMEEEE
---
### Author:  [@ryanmcell](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/ryanmcell)
#### Post date: [October 1, 2008, 11:04am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lame-hack-joke-thread/52945/46 "2008-10-01T11:04:44Z")
I \<3 this thread so much. Work day going by so fast.
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### Author:  [@Dr.Stevil](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Dr.Stevil)
#### Post date: [October 1, 2008, 11:06am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lame-hack-joke-thread/52945/47 "2008-10-01T11:06:43Z")
What the difference between Heath Ledger and Heath Ledger jokes?
Heath Ledger jokes will get old
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### Author:  [@Jagermeister](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Jagermeister)
#### Post date: [October 1, 2008, 11:23am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lame-hack-joke-thread/52945/48 "2008-10-01T11:23:56Z")
What’s the difference between a canoe and a jew?
Canoes tip.
---
### Author:  [@Tevenor](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Tevenor)
#### Post date: [October 1, 2008, 11:44am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lame-hack-joke-thread/52945/49 "2008-10-01T11:44:45Z")
What do you do with an elephant with 3 balls?
Walk him and pitch to the rhino
Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory?
She kept throwing away the "W"s.
---
### Author:  [@ImsloIkno](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/ImsloIkno)
#### Post date: [October 1, 2008, 11:49am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lame-hack-joke-thread/52945/50 "2008-10-01T11:49:24Z")
a guy is awaken with loud pounding on his front door… he opens his door to find a small snail. pissed off from being awakened he picks up the snail and throws it across the street… a week later he hears someone knockin at his front door… he opens the door to the snail asking…
“whyed you do that?”
---
### Author:  [@ubengineering](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/ubengineering)
#### Post date: [October 1, 2008, 2:38pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lame-hack-joke-thread/52945/51 "2008-10-01T14:38:09Z")
why cant you play cards in the jungle?
cause there’s too many cheetas
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### Author:  [@Motocrossx23](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Motocrossx23)
#### Post date: [October 1, 2008, 3:11pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lame-hack-joke-thread/52945/52 "2008-10-01T15:11:44Z")
Horrible, but…
What the difference between and pizza and a jew?
the pizza doesn’t scream when you put it in the oven
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### Author:  [@JEG](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/JEG)
#### Post date: [October 1, 2008, 3:24pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lame-hack-joke-thread/52945/53 "2008-10-01T15:24:39Z")
pizza’s don’t scream when you put them in the oven.
What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?
nothing you already told her twice.
What do you call a woman with two black eyes and a fat lip?
a slow learner.
---
### Author:  [@dawn](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/dawn)
#### Post date: [October 6, 2008, 4:08pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lame-hack-joke-thread/52945/54 "2008-10-06T16:08:42Z")
i know this is old. but this is the first time i saw this thread. and if i could, i’d give it +karma.
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### Author:  [@Dr.Stevil](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Dr.Stevil)
#### Post date: [December 11, 2008, 11:18am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lame-hack-joke-thread/52945/55 "2008-12-11T11:18:21Z")
😃
There was a young girl who lived up in the hills of Tennessee. She was about to turn sixteen, and couldn’t wait to get her driver’s liscense.
She had been subjected to much ribbing from her older brother, telling her that she was too dumb to get her liscense.
When the big day came around, she passed the test with flying colors.
She rushed home and asked her father if she could use the car that night so she and her friend could go in to town where all the cool kids were at.
The father said, “Sure honey, but you’ll have to give me a blow-job first.”
Wanting to go to town real bad, she agreed.
As she went down on her father, she suddenly jumped up an said “Dad your dick tastes like shit”
Oh yea, her father replied, “I forgot, your brother’s got the car tonight.”
---
### Author:  [@khoveraki](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/khoveraki)
#### Post date: [December 11, 2008, 11:27am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lame-hack-joke-thread/52945/56 "2008-12-11T11:27:24Z")
> [@sureshot!](#):
>
> Did you hear about the fire at the circus?
>
> it was intense
lmao.
What’d the farmer say when he lost his tractor?
Where’s my tractor?
---
### Author:  [@Willybeen](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Willybeen)
#### Post date: [December 11, 2008, 11:28am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lame-hack-joke-thread/52945/57 "2008-12-11T11:28:42Z")
> [@EvilJay](#):
>
> Donald Rumsfeld is giving the president his daily briefing. He concludes by saying: “Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed.”
>
> “OH NO!” the President exclaims. “That’s terrible!”
>
> His staff sits stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as the President sits, head in hands.
>
> Finally, the President looks up and asks, “How many is a brazillion?”
lol. well done.
---
### Author:  [@sureshot007](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/sureshot007)
#### Post date: [December 11, 2008, 11:29am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lame-hack-joke-thread/52945/58 "2008-12-11T11:29:45Z")
Why can’t Helen Keller drive?
_Because she’s a woman._
---
### Author:  [@Eazy716](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Eazy716)
#### Post date: [December 11, 2008, 11:45am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lame-hack-joke-thread/52945/59 "2008-12-11T11:45:08Z")
What do you call a man with no arms or legs floating in the middle of a pond?
Bob.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs on a wall?
Art
What do you call a guy with no arms or legs in your mailbox?
Bill
What do you call a guy with no arms or legs on a door step?
Matt
What do you call a guy with no arms or legs in a pile of leaves?
Rustle
What do you call a guy with no arms or legs in a ditch?
Phil
What do you call a guy with no arms or legs thats waterskiing?
Skip
What do you call a woman with one leg shorter then the other?
Eileen
What do you call an Asian woman with one leg shorter then the other?
Irene
---
### Author:  [@Fry](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Fry)
#### Post date: [December 11, 2008, 11:57am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lame-hack-joke-thread/52945/60 "2008-12-11T11:57:22Z")
> [@Eazy716](#):
>
> What do you call a woman with one leg shorter then the other?
> Eileen
>
> What do you call an Asian woman with one leg shorter then the other?
> Irene
:lol:
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