# lmao 30 chuck noris facts **URL:** \ **Category:** NYSpeed Off Topic\ **Created:** [November 4, 2005, 12:23pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lmao-30-chuck-noris-facts/4194 "2005-11-04T12:23:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Dr.Stevil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/da6949/32.png) [@Dr.Stevil](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Dr.Stevil)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2005, 12:23pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lmao-30-chuck-noris-facts/4194/1 "2005-11-04T12:23:04Z")
[http://www.4q.cc/chuck/index.php?topthirty](http://www.4q.cc/chuck/index.php?topthirty) funny stuff ---
**Author:** ![Zer0DazE](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/zer0daze/32/7624_2.png) [@Zer0DazE](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Zer0DazE)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2005, 12:50pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lmao-30-chuck-noris-facts/4194/2 "2005-11-04T12:50:22Z")
Chuck Norris was the fourth Wiseman. He brought baby Jesus the gift of “beard”. Jesus wore it proudly to his dying day. The other Wisemen, jealous of Jesus’ obvious gift favoritism, used their combined influence to have Chuck omitted from the Bible. Shortly after all three died of roundhouse kick related deaths. thats the best one ---
**Author:** ![RobHimself](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e480ec/32.png) [@RobHimself](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/RobHimself)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2005, 12:53pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lmao-30-chuck-noris-facts/4194/3 "2005-11-04T12:53:54Z")
Chuck Norris once went to a frat party, and proceeded to roundhouse every popped collar in sight. He then drank three kegs and shit on their floor, just because he’s Chuck Norris. Not the best but if it were only true. ---
**Author:** ![Juan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a698b9/32.png) [@Juan](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Juan)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2005, 12:55pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lmao-30-chuck-noris-facts/4194/4 "2005-11-04T12:55:52Z")
^ word lol ---
**Author:** ![tpgsr](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/tpgsr/32/7374_2.png) [@tpgsr](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/tpgsr)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2005, 12:58pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lmao-30-chuck-noris-facts/4194/5 "2005-11-04T12:58:22Z")
If you look at the bottom of the page, there are Mr. T facts to lol ---
**Author:** ![JaysGreenLX](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/jaysgreenlx/32/7321_2.png) [@JaysGreenLX](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/JaysGreenLX)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2005, 1:04pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lmao-30-chuck-noris-facts/4194/6 "2005-11-04T13:04:28Z")
Thats funny and I don’t know why. ---
**Author:** ![sureshot](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/sureshot/32/7578_2.png) [@sureshot](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/sureshot)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2005, 1:11pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lmao-30-chuck-noris-facts/4194/7 "2005-11-04T13:11:27Z")
i really dont think its funny whatsoever, the comedy style is a total rip off of that old ninjas site. honestly its just really gay and stupid ---
**Author:** ![TrueBlue](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/trueblue/32/7245_2.png) [@TrueBlue](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/TrueBlue)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2005, 1:21pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lmao-30-chuck-noris-facts/4194/8 "2005-11-04T13:21:40Z")
> Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits. 🤣 ---
**Author:** ![Jack](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/jack/32/7613_2.png) [@Jack](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Jack)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2005, 1:44pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lmao-30-chuck-noris-facts/4194/9 "2005-11-04T13:44:12Z")
> [@sureshot!](#): > > i really dont think its funny whatsoever, the comedy style is a total rip off of that old ninjas site. honestly its just really gay and stupid link? ---
**Author:** ![Twizted](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/twizted/32/7206_2.png) [@Twizted](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Twizted)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2005, 1:48pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lmao-30-chuck-noris-facts/4194/10 "2005-11-04T13:48:29Z")
In the eyes of a stranger… ---
**Author:** ![sureshot](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/sureshot/32/7578_2.png) [@sureshot](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/sureshot)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2005, 1:59pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lmao-30-chuck-noris-facts/4194/11 "2005-11-04T13:59:10Z")
> [@Jack](#): > > link? lol [http://www.realultimatepower.net/index4.htm](http://www.realultimatepower.net/index4.htm) ---
**Author:** ![JDMR2](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/jdmr2/32/7587_2.png) [@JDMR2](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/JDMR2)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2005, 5:48pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lmao-30-chuck-noris-facts/4194/12 "2005-11-04T17:48:55Z")
fuckin chuck norris ---
**Author:** ![JEG](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/jeg/32/7246_2.png) [@JEG](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/JEG)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2005, 6:05pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lmao-30-chuck-noris-facts/4194/13 "2005-11-04T18:05:03Z")
> [@sureshot!](#): > > i really dont think its funny whatsoever, the comedy style is a total rip off of that old ninjas site. honestly its just really gay and stupid yeah thats what my dads said…so i roudhouse kicked 'em i the face. “dont fuck with chuck” > If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can’t see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death > When Chuck Norris’s wife burned the turkey one Thanksgiving, Chuck said, “Don’t worry about it honey,” and went into his backyard. He came back five minutes later with a live turkey, ate it whole, and when he threw it up a few seconds later it was fully cooked and came with cranberry sauce. When his wife asked him how he had done it, he gave her a roundhouse kick to the face and said, “Never question Chuck Norris.” some good ones :lol: ---
**Author:** ![Fetter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c2a13f/32.png) [@Fetter](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Fetter)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2005, 6:12pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lmao-30-chuck-noris-facts/4194/14 "2005-11-04T18:12:07Z")
A couple of decent ones ---
**Author:** ![sureshot](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/sureshot/32/7578_2.png) [@sureshot](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/sureshot)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2005, 6:19pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lmao-30-chuck-noris-facts/4194/15 "2005-11-04T18:19:11Z")
> [@JEG](#): > > yeah thats what my dads said…so i roudhouse kicked 'em i the face. “dont fuck with chuck” well i may not be your dad, but that doesnt mean i didnt bang your mom 2 times ---
**Author:** ![Minglor](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/minglor/32/7373_2.png) [@Minglor](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Minglor)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2005, 10:50pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lmao-30-chuck-noris-facts/4194/16 "2005-11-04T22:50:44Z")
Chuck Norris can make a woman climax by simply pointing at her and saying “booya” ---
**Author:** ![Ninja](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/53a042/32.png) [@Ninja](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Ninja)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2005, 1:13am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lmao-30-chuck-noris-facts/4194/17 "2005-11-05T01:13:57Z")
horrible rip off of not only [realultimatepower.net](http://realultimatepower.net) but also the vin deisel random facts… been there done that. ---
**Author:** ![Rx3](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/rx3/32/7194_2.png) [@Rx3](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Rx3)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2005, 1:35am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lmao-30-chuck-noris-facts/4194/18 "2005-11-05T01:35:53Z")
:word: ---
**Author:** ![Twizted](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/twizted/32/7206_2.png) [@Twizted](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Twizted)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2005, 4:51am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lmao-30-chuck-noris-facts/4194/19 "2005-11-05T04:51:08Z")
lol i put the link in my away message last night and now about 5-6 of my friends have one of his quotes as there away message …:lol: ---
**Author:** ![RobHimself](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e480ec/32.png) [@RobHimself](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/RobHimself)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2005, 5:42am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lmao-30-chuck-noris-facts/4194/20 "2005-11-05T05:42:30Z")
> [@Ninja](#): > > horrible rip off of not only [realultimatepower.net](http://realultimatepower.net) but also the vin deisel random facts… > > been there done that. Word i forgot about this comedy gold “This one time, a rabbi, a priest, and Vin Diesel walked into a bar. Vin Diesel killed them both before another horrible joke could plague mankind.” [Next page](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/lmao-30-chuck-noris-facts/4194.md?page=2)