# Not that Jeff ever has any of these thoughts
**URL:** https://forums.speedlife.net/t/not-that-jeff-ever-has-any-of-these-thoughts/168918
**Category:** PittSpeed Off Topic
**Created:** [September 5, 2004, 5:41pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/not-that-jeff-ever-has-any-of-these-thoughts/168918 "2004-09-05T17:41:55Z")
**Posts on this page:** 6
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Jeff95TAsWife](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Jeff95TAsWife)
#### Post date: [September 5, 2004, 5:41pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/not-that-jeff-ever-has-any-of-these-thoughts/168918/1 "2004-09-05T17:41:55Z")
Every marriage is different but for us this is how we make our marriage
work;
Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little wine, some
good food and companionship. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.
We also sleep in separate beds. Her’s is in Cleveland and mine is in
Pittsburgh.
I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.
I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary. “Somewhere I
haven’t been in a long time!” she said. So I suggested the kitchen.
We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
She has an electric blender, electric toaster and electric bread maker.
Then she said, “There are too many gadgets and no place to sit down!”.
So I bought her an electric chair.
Remember… Marriage is the number one cause of divorce. Statistically
100% of all divorces started with marriage.
I married Miss Right. I just didn’t know her first name was Always.
I haven’t spoken to my wife for 18 months. I don’t like to interrupt
her.
The last fight was my fault. My wife asked, “What’s on the TV?”… I
said, “Dust!”
Why do men die before their wives? ‘Cause they want to’.
---
### Author:  [@slowcamaro](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/slowcamaro)
#### Post date: [September 5, 2004, 5:44pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/not-that-jeff-ever-has-any-of-these-thoughts/168918/2 "2004-09-05T17:44:10Z")
thats a good one
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### Author:  [@Pewter](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Pewter)
#### Post date: [September 5, 2004, 7:37pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/not-that-jeff-ever-has-any-of-these-thoughts/168918/3 "2004-09-05T19:37:35Z")
> [@slowcamaro](#):
>
> thats a good one
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### Author:  [@GNocide](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/GNocide)
#### Post date: [September 6, 2004, 11:29am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/not-that-jeff-ever-has-any-of-these-thoughts/168918/4 "2004-09-06T11:29:24Z")
:bigok:
a preist at our church used the electric chair funny for a sermon
---
### Author:  [@Darkstar](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Darkstar)
#### Post date: [September 6, 2004, 12:25pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/not-that-jeff-ever-has-any-of-these-thoughts/168918/5 "2004-09-06T12:25:03Z")
less posting, more cooking.
---
### Author:  [@Jeff95TA](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Jeff95TA)
#### Post date: [September 6, 2004, 1:26pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/not-that-jeff-ever-has-any-of-these-thoughts/168918/6 "2004-09-06T13:26:06Z")
> [@Darkstar](#):
>
> less posting, more cooking.
🤣