# so, a woman calls the police because... **URL:** \ **Category:** NYSpeed Off Topic\ **Created:** [November 4, 2009, 12:13pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/so-a-woman-calls-the-police-because/75709 "2009-11-04T12:13:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![theblue](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/theblue/32/5074_2.png) [@theblue](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/theblue)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2009, 12:13pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/so-a-woman-calls-the-police-because/75709/1 "2009-11-04T12:13:51Z")
this is way better then the typical “I’m unhappy with my bigmac” calls. > Woman phones the authorities moaning that her daughter gave her husband oral sex – and was better at it > By TED THORNHILL - Wednesday, November 4, 2009 > **We all know it’s a serious offense to waste police time, but try telling that to the woman who called officers to complain that her daughter had performed oral sex on her husband – and that the daughter was better at it.** > The guilty off-spring was actually the step-daughter of the man, and her crime of passion in Findlay, Ohio, has caused outrage among readers of the newspaper website that reported it, [thecourier.com](http://thecourier.com). > Their comment page has been flooded with angry responses. > One indignant reader, Lee, thought the story sucked: ’ I subscribe to The Courier but will cancel if the public record is going to be filled with details of multiple female family members servicing the male of the house. This is not news. I think any moral man or woman would call it what it is: depravity!’ > Another, Jeff, spat: ‘This is totally unprofessional and inappropriate for a newspaper to print.’ > However, the editor of [thecourier.com](http://thecourier.com) does have his supporters, not least one Mark Shelton, who had nothing but praise for the saucy story: ‘Gotta love The Courier’s docket writer! The most creative writing in any paper around. And for those that don’t like it, don’t read it!!’ > Whatever the rights and wrongs of publicising the incident, let’s just hope the daughter gets a, ahem, stiff sentence. [http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/article.html?Woman\_calls\_police\_because\_daughter\_was\_better\_at\_oral\_sex&in\_article\_id=762358&in\_page\_id=2](http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/article.html?Woman_calls_police_because_daughter_was_better_at_oral_sex&in_article_id=762358&in_page_id=2) the original article: [http://www.thecourier.com/Issues/2009/Nov/02/ar\_news\_110209\_story9.asp?d=110209\_story9,2009,Nov,02&c=n](http://www.thecourier.com/Issues/2009/Nov/02/ar_news_110209_story9.asp?d=110209_story9,2009,Nov,02&c=n) ---
**Author:** ![Geehee](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/geehee/32/7238_2.png) [@Geehee](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Geehee)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2009, 12:22pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/so-a-woman-calls-the-police-because/75709/2 "2009-11-04T12:22:04Z")
A+ ---
**Author:** ![Eazy716](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/eazy716/32/7443_2.png) [@Eazy716](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Eazy716)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2009, 12:46pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/so-a-woman-calls-the-police-because/75709/3 "2009-11-04T12:46:59Z")
one of the comments: > When I first read the story I laughed because, well, it’s just plain funny. The person(s)who writes the docket understand that they are the only reason many of us plunk down our 50 cents for a rag filled with heavily slanted local news and national AP stories we can read anywhere. > > Now, having read these comments, I’m reminded that the situation itself isn’t the most humorous part of the whole thing. It’s the people in this town…the overly zealous, book burners…the evangelicals…the people who wake up every day hoping and praying that when they look out their window they’ll find that, through some spooky Jesus-magic, it is again 1954. These people me fill my little cynical heart with joy. > > “Oh no! EVERYONE PANIC! The (sob) local news(sob)paper…made reference to…oh dear lord I can’t even say it…to…to…a “trouser kiss”…ya know…SODOMY!!!” > > Here’s to you Mr. & Mrs. Uptight Courier Reader…because your squawking and fake outrage…Findlay is once again in the world wide news. > > Check out [www.metro.co.uk/weird](http://www.metro.co.uk/weird) > > Keep up the good work everyone! :lol: ---
**Author:** ![Hass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/51bf81/32.png) [@Hass](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Hass)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2009, 1:34pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/so-a-woman-calls-the-police-because/75709/4 "2009-11-04T13:34:26Z")
lol ^^ ---
**Author:** ![glitch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/0ea827/32.png) [@glitch](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/glitch)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2009, 1:37pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/so-a-woman-calls-the-police-because/75709/5 "2009-11-04T13:37:12Z")
rofl @ “trouser kiss” ---
**Author:** ![thatguy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e5b9ba/32.png) [@thatguy](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/thatguy)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2009, 4:08pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/so-a-woman-calls-the-police-because/75709/6 "2009-11-04T16:08:48Z")
Redneck joke: A fat, lazy redneck is watching Nascar on Fox when his daughter enters the room and asks him for a ride to cheerleading practice. He looks at her angrily and says he doesn’t want to move and he isn’t going to take her to practice. She begs him for five minutes until he finally gives in and as he is unzipping his pants, he says “uggh, fine, you know what to do.” So she starts to fellate him and almost gags. She says, “Dad, your dick tastes like shit, what the fuck?” He looks at her and says, “Of course it does, your brother needed a ride to football practice!” ---
**Author:** ![Jam](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/jam/32/7235_2.png) [@Jam](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Jam)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2009, 4:57pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/so-a-woman-calls-the-police-because/75709/7 "2009-11-04T16:57:00Z")
OMG SODOMY ---
**Author:** ![kod](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/8e7dd6/32.png) [@kod](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/kod)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2009, 10:37pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/so-a-woman-calls-the-police-because/75709/8 "2009-11-05T22:37:48Z")
nO0ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo im only 20 minutes from Findlay as i write. Its supposed to be a nice town… ---
**Author:** ![vweegit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/57b2e6/32.png) [@vweegit](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/vweegit)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 10:48am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/so-a-woman-calls-the-police-because/75709/9 "2009-11-06T10:48:35Z")
“spooky Jesus-magic” 🤣 ---
**Author:** ![Bull49](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/bull49/32/7381_2.png) [@Bull49](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Bull49)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 11:07am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/so-a-woman-calls-the-police-because/75709/10 "2009-11-06T11:07:14Z")
:singing: ssoodomayheeeeeee, ssodomayheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, sodomaaayheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee :singing: sodomy. ---
**Author:** ![Adictd2b00st](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/adictd2b00st/32/7625_2.png) [@Adictd2b00st](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Adictd2b00st)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 11:20am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/so-a-woman-calls-the-police-because/75709/11 "2009-11-06T11:20:51Z")
:lol: people get offended by the dumbest crap ---
**Author:** ![klug](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/klug/32/5222_2.png) [@klug](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/klug)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 1:27pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/so-a-woman-calls-the-police-because/75709/12 "2009-11-06T13:27:30Z")
> [@Adictd2b00st](#): > > :lol: people get offended by the dumbest crap HEY WHY DONT YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP DICK!!! lol ---
**Author:** ![Cavi\_Mike](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/cavi_mike/32/5217_2.png) [@Cavi\_Mike](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Cavi_Mike)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 5:43pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/so-a-woman-calls-the-police-because/75709/13 "2009-11-06T17:43:54Z")
“A man was arrested Saturday for stealing Insane Clown Posse shot glasses” ---
**Author:** ![JDMSIR](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/jdmsir/32/7376_2.png) [@JDMSIR](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/JDMSIR)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 7:16pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/so-a-woman-calls-the-police-because/75709/14 "2009-11-06T19:16:10Z")
“Jeff, **spat** ” “One indignant reader, Lee, thought the story **sucked** ”