# To my fellow coworkers... **URL:** \ **Category:** NYSpeed Off Topic\ **Created:** [November 14, 2007, 8:05am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/to-my-fellow-coworkers/38731 "2007-11-14T08:05:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![BuickGN](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/buickgn/32/7200_2.png) [@BuickGN](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/BuickGN)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2007, 10:45am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/to-my-fellow-coworkers/38731/21 "2007-11-14T10:45:54Z")
[quote=“SVT3945,post:13,topic:38731"”] ADD A VENDING MACHINE AND YOU ARE SET [/quote] i tried, they wont go for it. ---
**Author:** ![slow84ta](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/slow84ta/32/7265_2.png) [@slow84ta](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/slow84ta)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2007, 11:00am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/to-my-fellow-coworkers/38731/22 "2007-11-14T11:00:44Z")
:lol: ---
**Author:** ![Fry](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/fry/32/7284_2.png) [@Fry](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Fry)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2008, 10:10am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/to-my-fellow-coworkers/38731/23 "2008-03-18T10:10:03Z")
Bump for the day after St Patty’s day… :picard: How the hell do you clench your asshole tight enough to build up that kind of pressure… ---
**Author:** ![Nikuk](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/nikuk/32/7254_2.png) [@Nikuk](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Nikuk)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2008, 10:11am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/to-my-fellow-coworkers/38731/24 "2008-03-18T10:11:57Z")
> [@Fry](#): > > How the hell do you clench your asshole tight enough to build up that kind of pressure… i see that You’ve never been to jail. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Russian](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/the_russian/32/7414_2.png) [@The\_Russian](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/The_Russian)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2008, 10:16am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/to-my-fellow-coworkers/38731/25 "2008-03-18T10:16:41Z")
There is no shit like being lactose intolerant, and then having some. For one it comes out of nowhere, and your ass just goes. YOU GO NOW, SHIT!! NOW!!! Then it fires out with a PSI of probably 15, you get major backsplash if your not careful and just let it go. ITS loud, it smells like rotten eggs and sulfur, it burns the nose, and only lasts about 20 seconds. Step 1, run to bathroom clenching your ass. Step 2 undo belt and button on patns before reaching stall, Step 3, if public bathroom, lay down TP anti aids seat. Step 4, Sit down, let er rip, with control as to not get backsplash. Step 5, listen for people going WTF!!! Step 6, stand up, clean up and slowly exit the bathroom so no one notices it was you. Step 7, wash hands and return to work with you asshole on fire. ---
**Author:** ![Fry](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/fry/32/7284_2.png) [@Fry](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Fry)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2008, 10:18am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/to-my-fellow-coworkers/38731/26 "2008-03-18T10:18:42Z")
:word: I had an epiphany and realized that I was lactose intolerant the night I actually lost my balance and almost fell off the toilet. ---
**Author:** ![Nikuk](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/nikuk/32/7254_2.png) [@Nikuk](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Nikuk)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2008, 10:19am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/to-my-fellow-coworkers/38731/27 "2008-03-18T10:19:40Z")
Wait, wat? ---
**Author:** ![justa4door](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/justa4door/32/7259_2.png) [@justa4door](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/justa4door)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2008, 10:21am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/to-my-fellow-coworkers/38731/28 "2008-03-18T10:21:08Z")
poop just poop ---
**Author:** ![drvnkd](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/drvnkd/32/109615_2.png) [@drvnkd](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/drvnkd)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2008, 11:26am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/to-my-fellow-coworkers/38731/29 "2008-03-18T11:26:08Z")
You realize that you are in the business of selling specialty gases right? ---
**Author:** ![Ovrwrkd](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/ovrwrkd/32/7586_2.png) [@Ovrwrkd](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Ovrwrkd)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2008, 11:45am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/to-my-fellow-coworkers/38731/30 "2008-03-18T11:45:43Z")
> [@Fry](#): > > :word: I had an epiphany and realized that I was lactose intolerant the night I actually lost my balance and almost fell off the toilette. You didn’t by chance hit your head and come up with this? ---
**Author:** ![fiend540](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/bcef8e/32.png) [@fiend540](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/fiend540)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2008, 11:54am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/to-my-fellow-coworkers/38731/31 "2008-03-18T11:54:41Z")
> [@The\_Russian](#): > > Then it fires out with a PSI of probably 15, you get major backsplash if your not careful and just let it go. The key to no backsplash is the to make a tp landing pad first. ---
**Author:** ![Fry](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/fry/32/7284_2.png) [@Fry](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Fry)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2008, 12:01pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/to-my-fellow-coworkers/38731/32 "2008-03-18T12:01:31Z")
That’s nice, but doesn’t help when my coworkers are sharting hard enough to get bass drum style resonance from a toilet bowl. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Russian](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/the_russian/32/7414_2.png) [@The\_Russian](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/The_Russian)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2008, 12:08pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/to-my-fellow-coworkers/38731/33 "2008-03-18T12:08:41Z")
I dont get drum bass. More like if you had a blow off valve set to 20 psi, but instead of blowing just air, it blew air and 10w30 oil at the same time, with random chunks in there. ---
**Author:** ![drvnkd](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/drvnkd/32/109615_2.png) [@drvnkd](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/drvnkd)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2008, 12:08pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/to-my-fellow-coworkers/38731/34 "2008-03-18T12:08:49Z")
Rig a sound activated strobe…? then turn out the light… ---
**Author:** ![Carnut](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/carnut/32/7590_2.png) [@Carnut](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Carnut)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2008, 12:18pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/to-my-fellow-coworkers/38731/35 "2008-03-18T12:18:26Z")
print that and post it on the inside of the mens room door ---
**Author:** ![drvnkd](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/drvnkd/32/109615_2.png) [@drvnkd](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/drvnkd)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2008, 12:40pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/to-my-fellow-coworkers/38731/36 "2008-03-18T12:40:47Z")
or… you can rig my huge button. Thats surely to piss them off and get them out in a hurry? Better yet… strobes and fuccillo. ---
**Author:** ![Karter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e480ec/32.png) [@Karter](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Karter)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2008, 1:09pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/to-my-fellow-coworkers/38731/37 "2008-03-18T13:09:38Z")
> [@Fry](#): > > COT DAMN IT WHAT THE FUCK DO THESE PEOPLE EAT?! > > I’m about to coat the walls in that bathroom with sound deadening foam. Shit fucking echos. Mustard Onions hot italian sausage covered in sourkrawt and cashed with a 6 pic of Genesee cream ale. ---
**Author:** ![AfXtc777](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a9adbd/32.png) [@AfXtc777](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/AfXtc777)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2008, 7:43pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/to-my-fellow-coworkers/38731/38 "2008-03-18T19:43:14Z")
I can has the assplosions when I eat anything dairy=) ---
**Author:** ![The\_Russian](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/the_russian/32/7414_2.png) [@The\_Russian](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/The_Russian)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2008, 7:50pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/to-my-fellow-coworkers/38731/39 "2008-03-18T19:50:03Z")
You get a few warnings with it. A few really horrid, silent but rediculus farts. a few feelings of your intestines, building pressure(thats your signal to get moving) You got about 60 seconds after the gurgling intestines before your gonna blow and you cannot stop it. I have deemed this the “Rocket Shit” or RS for work safe ---
**Author:** ![Joe](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/joe/32/7219_2.png) [@Joe](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Joe)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2008, 7:53pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/to-my-fellow-coworkers/38731/40 "2008-03-18T19:53:45Z")
Dynamat the stalls? Not only will it keep the sound contained, but it will really help the SQ and SPL for feces hitting water. [Previous page](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/to-my-fellow-coworkers/38731.md?page=1) [Next page](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/to-my-fellow-coworkers/38731.md?page=3)