# Tp

**URL:** <https://forums.speedlife.net/t/tp/173878>\
**Category:** PittSpeed Off Topic\
**Created:** [April 23, 2005, 3:48pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/tp/173878 "2005-04-23T15:48:23Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 6\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Shaggy](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/shaggy/32/5945_2.png) [@Shaggy](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Shaggy)\
**Post date:** [April 23, 2005, 3:48pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/tp/173878/1 "2005-04-23T15:48:23Z")

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Toilet Paper

A rather attractive woman goes up to the bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the barman who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face close to hers. When he does so, she begins to gently caress his beard which is full and bushy.

“Are you the manager?” she asks, softly stroking his face with both hands.

“Actually, no” he replies.

“Can you get him for me - I need to speak to him?” she asks, running her hands up beyond his beard and into his hair.

“I’m afraid I can’t” breathes the barman - clearly aroused. “Is there anything I can do?”

“Yes there is. I need you to give him a message” she continues huskily, popping a couple of fingers into his mouth and allowing him to suck them gently. “Tell him that there is no toilet paper in the ladies room.”

:fart:

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**Author:** ![1320](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/1320/32/5949_2.png) [@1320](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/1320)\
**Post date:** [April 23, 2005, 3:56pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/tp/173878/2 "2005-04-23T15:56:45Z")

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:down: lame X \*

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**Author:** ![Shaggy](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/shaggy/32/5945_2.png) [@Shaggy](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Shaggy)\
**Post date:** [April 23, 2005, 3:59pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/tp/173878/3 "2005-04-23T15:59:53Z")

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> [@unicorn](#):
>
> :down: lame X \*

![http://www.w3bdevil.com/forums/STFU-HandPuppet.gif](http://www.w3bdevil.com/forums/STFU-HandPuppet.gif)

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**Author:** ![1320](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/1320/32/5949_2.png) [@1320](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/1320)\
**Post date:** [April 23, 2005, 4:01pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/tp/173878/4 "2005-04-23T16:01:54Z")

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:rolleyes:

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**Author:** ![Darkstar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@Darkstar](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Darkstar)\
**Post date:** [April 23, 2005, 4:57pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/tp/173878/5 "2005-04-23T16:57:24Z")

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> [@unicorn](#):
>
> :down: lame X \*

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**Author:** ![S10Blazed\_Si](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/s10blazed_si/32/5983_2.png) [@S10Blazed\_Si](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/S10Blazed_Si)\
**Post date:** [April 23, 2005, 10:19pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/tp/173878/6 "2005-04-23T22:19:52Z")

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when I read the title, the first thing that came to mind was “for my bunghole!”

I think you should of posted that instead.