# twat blocker opens up last night **URL:** \ **Category:** Shift518 Off Topic\ **Created:** [April 4, 2009, 5:03am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/twat-blocker-opens-up-last-night/243290 "2009-04-04T05:03:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![SXY\_TIME](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/sxy_time/32/6293_2.png) [@SXY\_TIME](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/SXY_TIME)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2009, 5:03am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/twat-blocker-opens-up-last-night/243290/1 "2009-04-04T05:03:09Z")
ok so long story short, a few weekends ago, i went out with some friends and a few girls, one of the girls was all over me all night then we get back to her and her roommates apt and we’re chillin on the couch and she whispers in my ear that we’re going to share a bed. im just like, very niiiiiice, i gonna get a laid!! (i didnt say that out loud, just thought that in my goofy borat voice) so anyways, we go to get up to head up there and her roommate said to hang on and that she had to talk to her, they disappear for 20 mins then the roommate comes back telling me that the girl i was about to boing didnt feel good and that they were going to sleep (the couch that night was not comfy lol) so last night, i was out with the roommate and then she tells me she wants me to be her “summer fling” if you will, which i mean, i have no prob fucking her, i would just prefer the other girl from previous weeks lol (but she does have a hot british accent and her parents love me after knowing me for like an hour haha) so then it hit me that the night that her friend was allegedly “sick” it was just her talking her outta hooking up with me so that she can. oh wellas long as one of them gets the D, im cool with it…Very NIIIIIICCCCEEEEE /story im still a little drunk from last night and now i have to go to work until 6…FML ---
**Author:** ![Cliff](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b38774/32.png) [@Cliff](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Cliff)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2009, 5:19am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/twat-blocker-opens-up-last-night/243290/2 "2009-04-04T05:19:23Z")
3way that shit and make them finger the others asshole. You should call the roomies out, same time, and be like since you wanted to fuck me, and you want to fuck me, you can both do it right now. Done. You’re in. And dont take no for an answer. you’re bigger than them. ---
**Author:** ![SRS\_BZNS](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/srs_bzns/32/6375_2.png) [@SRS\_BZNS](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/SRS_BZNS)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2009, 6:16am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/twat-blocker-opens-up-last-night/243290/3 "2009-04-04T06:16:14Z")
I woke up this morning and stumble out of my room and to my suprise there is a super and i mean super cute girl asleep on my couch. My room mates boyfriends sister. Ofcourse I went to F&F then went out drinking last night so I look like complete shit…FML ---
**Author:** ![deadbeatrec](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/deadbeatrec/32/6401_2.png) [@deadbeatrec](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/deadbeatrec)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2009, 6:17am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/twat-blocker-opens-up-last-night/243290/4 "2009-04-04T06:17:27Z")
Fml? ---
**Author:** ![SRS\_BZNS](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/srs_bzns/32/6375_2.png) [@SRS\_BZNS](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/SRS_BZNS)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2009, 6:23am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/twat-blocker-opens-up-last-night/243290/5 "2009-04-04T06:23:08Z")
fuck my life? you dont know what that is? ---
**Author:** ![SXY\_TIME](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/sxy_time/32/6293_2.png) [@SXY\_TIME](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/SXY_TIME)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2009, 3:28pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/twat-blocker-opens-up-last-night/243290/6 "2009-04-04T15:28:16Z")
who doesnt know fuck my life??? why make a joke on a mother in law? lol ---
**Author:** ![kramerbuccs24](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/kramerbuccs24/32/6397_2.png) [@kramerbuccs24](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/kramerbuccs24)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2009, 3:30pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/twat-blocker-opens-up-last-night/243290/7 "2009-04-04T15:30:46Z")
> [@FS garage cleanout](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/fs-garage-cleanout/16622/18): > > who doesnt know fuck my life??? **why make a joke on a mother in law?** lol :rofl :rofl :rofl “is it funny in america to… make a joke on teh mother in law???/?” ---
**Author:** ![SXY\_TIME](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/sxy_time/32/6293_2.png) [@SXY\_TIME](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/SXY_TIME)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2009, 3:31pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/twat-blocker-opens-up-last-night/243290/8 "2009-04-04T15:31:39Z")
haha if you couldnt tell by the username (which is also my license plate) i live by borat haha ---
**Author:** ![kramerbuccs24](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/kramerbuccs24/32/6397_2.png) [@kramerbuccs24](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/kramerbuccs24)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2009, 4:01pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/twat-blocker-opens-up-last-night/243290/9 "2009-04-04T16:01:24Z")
the first time i saw that movie was in the theater and i only heard 1/4 of it because the entire place was SCREAMING with laughter. greatest time i’ve had in a theater by far. ---
**Author:** ![Cliff](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b38774/32.png) [@Cliff](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Cliff)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2009, 6:32pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/twat-blocker-opens-up-last-night/243290/10 "2009-04-04T18:32:11Z")
I went to see Borat with jeremiah and my friend Skip… at the end where he says, “we no longer practice the running of the jews, we now practice christianity” and they were poking a crucified jesus with pitchforks… the whole movie theatre just gasped and was completely silent… and all you could hear was me, jeremiah and skip laughing our asses off. ---
**Author:** ![mcflurry](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/mcflurry/32/6468_2.png) [@mcflurry](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/mcflurry)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2009, 11:04am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/twat-blocker-opens-up-last-night/243290/11 "2009-04-05T11:04:13Z")
> [@ROFL The preacher of that Zion Temple joint on North Forest lives next to my parents](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/rofl-the-preacher-of-that-zion-temple-joint-on-north-forest-lives-next-to-my-parents/16662/32): > > ok so long story short, a few weekends ago, i went out with some friends and a few girls, one of the girls was all over me all night then we get back to her and her roommates apt and we’re chillin on the couch and she whispers in my ear that we’re going to share a bed. im just like, very niiiiiice, i gonna get a laid!! (i didnt say that out loud, just thought that in my goofy borat voice) so anyways, we go to get up to head up there and her roommate said to hang on and that she had to talk to her, they disappear for 20 mins then the roommate comes back telling me that the girl i was about to boing didnt feel good and that they were going to sleep (the couch that night was not comfy lol) > > so last night, i was out with the roommate and then she tells me she wants me to be her “summer fling” if you will, which i mean, i have no prob fucking her, i would just prefer the other girl from previous weeks lol (but she does have a hot british accent and her parents love me after knowing me for like an hour haha) so then it hit me that the night that her friend was allegedly “sick” it was just her talking her outta hooking up with me so that she can. oh wellas long as one of them gets the D, im cool with it…Very NIIIIIICCCCEEEEE > > /story > im still a little drunk from last night and now i have to go to work until 6…FML sooo hook a mother fucker up?:hug ---
**Author:** ![88slowmarro](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/88slowmarro/32/6339_2.png) [@88slowmarro](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/88slowmarro)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2009, 11:08am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/twat-blocker-opens-up-last-night/243290/12 "2009-04-05T11:08:34Z")
listen to this as ya walk in next time and they will both be wet ---
**Author:** ![SXY\_TIME](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/sxy_time/32/6293_2.png) [@SXY\_TIME](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/SXY_TIME)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2009, 10:26pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/twat-blocker-opens-up-last-night/243290/13 "2009-04-05T22:26:08Z")
john…lmao how did i know your crazy ass would post something like that ---
**Author:** ![votblindub](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/votblindub/32/6280_2.png) [@votblindub](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/votblindub)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2009, 3:11pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/twat-blocker-opens-up-last-night/243290/14 "2009-04-06T15:11:56Z")
Meena, theres moe than one and you dont call me? BOO! ---
**Author:** ![SXY\_TIME](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/sxy_time/32/6293_2.png) [@SXY\_TIME](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/SXY_TIME)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2009, 5:30pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/twat-blocker-opens-up-last-night/243290/15 "2009-04-06T17:30:23Z")
> [@FS.. 99 yamaha R6 pics up!](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/fs-99-yamaha-r6-pics-up/16333/39): > > Meena, theres moe than one and you dont call me? BOO! there was another guy who had ended up leaving in the middle of the night otherwise you woulda been there! :hug: ---
**Author:** ![votblindub](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/votblindub/32/6280_2.png) [@votblindub](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/votblindub)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2009, 6:28pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/twat-blocker-opens-up-last-night/243290/16 "2009-04-06T18:28:54Z")
next time! [![http://s334.photobucket.com/albums/m429/VOTBLINDUB/Random/?action=view¤t=1230223811262.gif](http://s334.photobucket.com/albums/m429/VOTBLINDUB/Random/?action=view¤t=1230223811262.gif)](http://s334.photobucket.com/albums/m429/VOTBLINDUB/Random/?action=view¤t=OwlRapeTime.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![SXY\_TIME](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/sxy_time/32/6293_2.png) [@SXY\_TIME](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/SXY_TIME)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2009, 6:44pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/twat-blocker-opens-up-last-night/243290/17 "2009-04-06T18:44:37Z")
sexy time! ---
**Author:** ![SXY\_TIME](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/sxy_time/32/6293_2.png) [@SXY\_TIME](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/SXY_TIME)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2009, 6:44pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/twat-blocker-opens-up-last-night/243290/18 "2009-04-06T18:44:48Z")
no homo ---
**Author:** ![votblindub](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/votblindub/32/6280_2.png) [@votblindub](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/votblindub)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2009, 6:49pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/twat-blocker-opens-up-last-night/243290/19 "2009-04-06T18:49:05Z")
> [@Jessica Beil and her retardedly jacked body](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/jessica-beil-and-her-retardedly-jacked-body/16757/9): > > no homo nuuu, none of that, separate rooms, unless were tag teaming one, but then its only gay if the balls touch :lol ---
**Author:** ![SXY\_TIME](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/sxy_time/32/6293_2.png) [@SXY\_TIME](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/SXY_TIME)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2009, 7:38pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/twat-blocker-opens-up-last-night/243290/20 "2009-04-06T19:38:13Z")
> [@votblindub"](#): > > nuuu, none of that, separate rooms, unless were tag teaming one, but then its only gay if the balls touch :lol we could always just take her to paris??? lol HIGH FIIIIIIVVEEEE!!! [Next page](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/twat-blocker-opens-up-last-night/243290.md?page=2)