# when your wife or girl wont put out!!!! **URL:** \ **Category:** Shift518 Off Topic\ **Created:** [December 3, 2009, 7:37am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/when-your-wife-or-girl-wont-put-out/248797 "2009-12-03T07:37:48Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![freakLS7](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/freakls7/32/6298_2.png) [@freakLS7](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/freakLS7)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 7:37am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/when-your-wife-or-girl-wont-put-out/248797/1 "2009-12-03T07:37:48Z")
One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, ‘I don’t feel like it, I just want you to hold me.’ I said, ‘WHAT??!! What was that?!’ So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear… ‘You’re just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.’ She responded to my puzzled look by saying, ‘Can’t you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?’ Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep. The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while sh e tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn’t decide which one to take, so I told her we’d just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, ‘Lets get a pair for each outfit.’ We went on to the jewelry department where se picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you… she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn’t even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, ‘That’s fine, honey.’ She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is all dear, let’s go to the cashier.’ I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, ‘No honey, I don’t feel like it.’ Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, ‘WHAT?’ I then said, ‘Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You’re just not in touch w ith my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs a woman.’ and just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, ‘Why can’t you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?’ Apparently I’m not having sex tonight either…but at least that Bitch knows I’m smarter than her. ![http://www.thesmilies.com/smilies/silly/neenerneener.gif](http://www.thesmilies.com/smilies/silly/neenerneener.gif) ---
**Author:** ![Mk4\_30R\_Ban](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/mk4_30r_ban/32/6347_2.png) [@Mk4\_30R\_Ban](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Mk4_30R_Ban)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 7:43am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/when-your-wife-or-girl-wont-put-out/248797/2 "2009-12-03T07:43:05Z")
^ awesome story. non-fiction or fiction?? ---
**Author:** ![Sully93vr4](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/sully93vr4/32/6278_2.png) [@Sully93vr4](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Sully93vr4)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 7:44am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/when-your-wife-or-girl-wont-put-out/248797/3 "2009-12-03T07:44:33Z")
Very funny. I’ve seen that before somewhere else though… hmmm ---
**Author:** ![freakLS7](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/freakls7/32/6298_2.png) [@freakLS7](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/freakLS7)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 7:46am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/when-your-wife-or-girl-wont-put-out/248797/4 "2009-12-03T07:46:34Z")
got it from another forum… just thought it was funny! ---
**Author:** ![Murrdog9000](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/murrdog9000/32/6391_2.png) [@Murrdog9000](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Murrdog9000)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 7:49am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/when-your-wife-or-girl-wont-put-out/248797/5 "2009-12-03T07:49:47Z")
Excellent story… if this is a true story of yours then :bowdown ---
**Author:** ![Dread](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/dread/32/6544_2.png) [@Dread](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Dread)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 7:51am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/when-your-wife-or-girl-wont-put-out/248797/6 "2009-12-03T07:51:43Z")
Not the first time ive read that but still as hilarious as the first time ---
**Author:** ![Sully93vr4](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/sully93vr4/32/6278_2.png) [@Sully93vr4](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Sully93vr4)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 7:52am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/when-your-wife-or-girl-wont-put-out/248797/7 "2009-12-03T07:52:03Z")
> [@Missing a Neon, need some help](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/missing-a-neon-need-some-help/26724/3): > > Excellent story… if this is a true story of yours then :bowdown It’s not. Reading \> you ---
**Author:** ![SRS\_BZNS](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/srs_bzns/32/6375_2.png) [@SRS\_BZNS](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/SRS_BZNS)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 7:52am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/when-your-wife-or-girl-wont-put-out/248797/8 "2009-12-03T07:52:10Z")
LOL. I wouldn’t have gone that far. I would have just punched the bitch in the mouth when she left me hangin ---
**Author:** ![Murrdog9000](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/murrdog9000/32/6391_2.png) [@Murrdog9000](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Murrdog9000)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 7:53am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/when-your-wife-or-girl-wont-put-out/248797/9 "2009-12-03T07:53:07Z")
> [@FS: \`97 Ford Explorer XLT](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/fs-97-ford-explorer-xlt/13094/53): > > It’s not. Reading \> you wow… im off point today. thorry thully ---
**Author:** ![Sully93vr4](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/sully93vr4/32/6278_2.png) [@Sully93vr4](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Sully93vr4)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 7:54am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/when-your-wife-or-girl-wont-put-out/248797/10 "2009-12-03T07:54:09Z")
> [@Missing a Neon, need some help](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/missing-a-neon-need-some-help/26724/6): > > wow… im off point today. thorry thully better be! :hug ---
**Author:** ![ninety1two40](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/ninety1two40/32/6332_2.png) [@ninety1two40](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/ninety1two40)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 7:56am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/when-your-wife-or-girl-wont-put-out/248797/11 "2009-12-03T07:56:51Z")
> [@Sabres, no. 1 team of all major league sports.](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/sabres-no-1-team-of-all-major-league-sports/26717/9): > > LOL. I wouldn’t have gone that far. I would have just punched the bitch in the mouth when she left me hangin :rofl +rep ---
**Author:** ![99FRC](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/99frc/32/6335_2.png) [@99FRC](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/99FRC)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 7:59am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/when-your-wife-or-girl-wont-put-out/248797/12 "2009-12-03T07:59:47Z")
hahaha ---
**Author:** ![deadbeatrec](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/deadbeatrec/32/6401_2.png) [@deadbeatrec](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/deadbeatrec)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 8:23am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/when-your-wife-or-girl-wont-put-out/248797/13 "2009-12-03T08:23:15Z")
holy old batman! ---
**Author:** ![Wayne64SS](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/wayne64ss/32/6365_2.png) [@Wayne64SS](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Wayne64SS)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 10:34am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/when-your-wife-or-girl-wont-put-out/248797/14 "2009-12-03T10:34:56Z")
E your sig cracks me up! I love that show!!! ---
**Author:** ![ReDevil](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/redevil/32/6385_2.png) [@ReDevil](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/ReDevil)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 10:55am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/when-your-wife-or-girl-wont-put-out/248797/15 "2009-12-03T10:55:27Z")
I found that amusing. +rep because I feel like it. ---
**Author:** ![6SPD\_S4](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/6spd_s4/32/6326_2.png) [@6SPD\_S4](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/6SPD_S4)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 1:08pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/when-your-wife-or-girl-wont-put-out/248797/16 "2009-12-03T13:08:39Z")
Haha good shit John, first time I heard that. ---
**Author:** ![94Gt5.0](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/94gt5.0/32/6377_2.png) [@94Gt5.0](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/94Gt5.0)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 1:18pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/when-your-wife-or-girl-wont-put-out/248797/17 "2009-12-03T13:18:26Z")
BWHAHAHAHA yess! That is awesome ---
**Author:** ![beepbeep](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/beepbeep/32/6355_2.png) [@beepbeep](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/beepbeep)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 2:39pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/when-your-wife-or-girl-wont-put-out/248797/18 "2009-12-03T14:39:59Z")
> [@FS: 1992 Talon TSi AWD Parts car (4bolt)](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/fs-1992-talon-tsi-awd-parts-car-4bolt/26007/12): > > BWHAHAHAHA yess! That is awesome Lol John that was great! ---
**Author:** ![SSmokinn\_SS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ec9cab/32.png) [@SSmokinn\_SS](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/SSmokinn_SS)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 7:28pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/when-your-wife-or-girl-wont-put-out/248797/19 "2009-12-03T19:28:09Z")
dude., That is awesome! PS, I get that “I dont feel like it” shit all the time. I just get pissed and go on the computer, rant and rave and start shit on shift, then go to sleep…only for the following night she wants some and I shut her down. Payback is a bitch. ---
**Author:** ![justin2386](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/justin2386/32/6496_2.png) [@justin2386](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/justin2386)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 7:36pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/when-your-wife-or-girl-wont-put-out/248797/20 "2009-12-03T19:36:06Z")
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA 🤣rofl:rofl:rofl:rofl:rofl:rofl:rofl:rofl:rofl:rofl:rofl:rofl:rofl:rofl:rofl:rofl:rofl:rofl:rofl:rofl:rofl:rofl:rofl:rofl:rofl:rofl:rofl:rofl [Next page](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/when-your-wife-or-girl-wont-put-out/248797.md?page=2)