# Why Richard Hates Koalas **URL:** \ **Category:** Shift518 Off Topic\ **Created:** [October 6, 2010, 6:07am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/why-richard-hates-koalas/254908 "2010-10-06T06:07:06Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Ilya](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/ilya/32/6404_2.png) [@Ilya](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Ilya)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 6:07am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/why-richard-hates-koalas/254908/1 "2010-10-06T06:07:06Z")
This was an email sent to me. True or not, I was laughing pretty much all the way through it: This essay was written by an 8th grader in Pittsburgh in the spring of 2004. The assignment was to pick an endangered species, and explain why it’s important to save it. The typos and formatting are preserved from the original. ``` Richard XXXXXXXX Draft 2 I shouldn't do sht. I don't care about them they all could die and it won't affect my life. I know a lot about them but I don't need to think about them. They're just a waste of time koalas are stupid they don't help me with sht so why should I help them. If they all die there will be more room for the panthers and all the other hard animals. Koalas are weak a pit will get rid of their whole fucking family. That's why I don't like koalas. Koalas have sharp claws but they are weak. They all small and fat and they be climing trees. I hope a storm just come while they just chilling up in the tree thinking they is hard and ``` they’re will all just fall off. They just break they neck and shit. When they fall they claws are going to fall off and they going to be crying like some little bitches. ``` Koalas aren't hard they some little bitches. They start climbing up the tree soon as they see a deer from like 50feet away. They stupid as hell they should put their brain in their ``` pouch and put the kid in they ten they’re be able to think better. They try to be in the fuking kangaroo family. They weak as hell, talking bout they got a pouch a kangaroo so they their cousins and shit. Kangaroo’s have some big ass legs and whot do a koala got? Some little ass legs, they tails is little and weak as fuck kangaroo’s got a big ass long tail that can kill a fuking koala. ``` If a koala goes in the water it won't be able to breathe with its little short ass. It'd fuking drown soon aas it take one step into the water. While they at the river trying to get something to drink a bear could just come to him and snatch its ass up. It doesn't know protection because they don't have protection. What they little ass going to do? It can't scratch him. The bear will beat his fuking ass. The important think about koalas is that just don't care about tem and let them die by all the other animals in Australia. They're not important just let nature do what it do and kill them. Koalas do not have a place in this world there's not enough room for all the bitches in this world. So let all the koalas that's in the zoos and shit. Let them go and put them back with their family. If you let them all go they won't nothing except for that's what they was put in this world for. Now you know why koalas aren't important. They have nothing to do except for sitting around in the trees. It's like they just was like they was sent have to die. Koalas don't do ``` nothing to help anybody. Thre would be just one more relative of the kangaroo that will be six feet under. Now you know why koalas are not important because there are dumb. ---
**Author:** ![psi2high](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/psi2high/32/6320_2.png) [@psi2high](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/psi2high)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 6:11am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/why-richard-hates-koalas/254908/2 "2010-10-06T06:11:04Z")
Sounds like a Harvard scholar to me ---
**Author:** ![deadbeatrec](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/deadbeatrec/32/6401_2.png) [@deadbeatrec](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/deadbeatrec)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 6:13am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/why-richard-hates-koalas/254908/3 "2010-10-06T06:13:12Z")
im now dumber for having read this ---
**Author:** ![Ilya](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/ilya/32/6404_2.png) [@Ilya](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Ilya)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 6:14am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/why-richard-hates-koalas/254908/4 "2010-10-06T06:14:32Z")
> [@FS: 5 x 114.3 ASA wheels and Dunlop snow tires](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/fs-5-x-114-3-asa-wheels-and-dunlop-snow-tires/35564/4): > > im now dumber for having read this :facepalm…it’s from ‘an 8th grader’. It’s funny…especially paragraph two. ---
**Author:** ![johnnyk](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/johnnyk/32/6480_2.png) [@johnnyk](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/johnnyk)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 6:19am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/why-richard-hates-koalas/254908/5 "2010-10-06T06:19:30Z")
inner city schools at their finest ---
**Author:** ![jdaniels](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/jdaniels/32/6399_2.png) [@jdaniels](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/jdaniels)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 6:19am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/why-richard-hates-koalas/254908/6 "2010-10-06T06:19:51Z")
Paragraph 1 is totally different from the rest of the “paper”. It went from half-wit to full negro in seconds. ---
**Author:** ![deadbeatrec](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/deadbeatrec/32/6401_2.png) [@deadbeatrec](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/deadbeatrec)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 6:27am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/why-richard-hates-koalas/254908/7 "2010-10-06T06:27:12Z")
> [@What in the hell did I just watch?](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/what-in-the-hell-did-i-just-watch/35580/10): > > :facepalm…it’s from ‘an 8th grader’. It’s funny…especially paragraph two. it went from being decently funny to over the top stupid. sorry :retardclap ---
**Author:** ![psi2high](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/psi2high/32/6320_2.png) [@psi2high](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/psi2high)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 6:42am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/why-richard-hates-koalas/254908/8 "2010-10-06T06:42:58Z")
> [@Need inspection sticker ASAP!](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/need-inspection-sticker-asap/35577/10): > > Paragraph 1 is totally different from the rest of the “paper”. It went from half-wit to full negro in seconds. Its hilarious that they write and type just like they talk. They would rather find new ways to spell a word then just spell it correctly. ---
**Author:** ![jdaniels](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/jdaniels/32/6399_2.png) [@jdaniels](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/jdaniels)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 6:45am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/why-richard-hates-koalas/254908/9 "2010-10-06T06:45:51Z")
i do dat cuz i wanna f u gotta prollem wit ma gramma u ken fukoff u no wut im sayn ---
**Author:** ![psi2high](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/psi2high/32/6320_2.png) [@psi2high](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/psi2high)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 6:47am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/why-richard-hates-koalas/254908/10 "2010-10-06T06:47:29Z")
No see that grammar was way to good to pass off as one of theirs ---
**Author:** ![jdaniels](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/jdaniels/32/6399_2.png) [@jdaniels](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/jdaniels)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 6:52am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/why-richard-hates-koalas/254908/11 "2010-10-06T06:52:14Z")
When you say theirs, you mean jazz musicians and people with rhythm? ---
**Author:** ![johnnyk](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/johnnyk/32/6480_2.png) [@johnnyk](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/johnnyk)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 6:54am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/why-richard-hates-koalas/254908/12 "2010-10-06T06:54:19Z")
yes jazz musicians and people with rhythm ![http://i131.photobucket.com/albums/p293/ITZRASAQbOY/I_cant_see_shit.jpg](http://i131.photobucket.com/albums/p293/ITZRASAQbOY/I_cant_see_shit.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![KrazyKid](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/krazykid/32/6371_2.png) [@KrazyKid](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/KrazyKid)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 7:01am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/why-richard-hates-koalas/254908/13 "2010-10-06T07:01:00Z")
Sounds like this little punk ass wanabee gang banger 13 year old from colonie wrote that: ![http://shift518.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=2886&stc=1&d=1286373510](http://shift518.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=2886&stc=1&d=1286373510) :rofl Stay in school kids, or you will sound like ratards in ur skool paparz… or get caught stealing car parts or driving around in cars that arnt yours. hahahahahah ---
**Author:** ![Ilya](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/ilya/32/6404_2.png) [@Ilya](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Ilya)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 8:02am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/why-richard-hates-koalas/254908/14 "2010-10-06T08:02:01Z")
:rofl ---
**Author:** ![psi2high](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/psi2high/32/6320_2.png) [@psi2high](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/psi2high)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 8:09am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/why-richard-hates-koalas/254908/15 "2010-10-06T08:09:09Z")
Lmao yes plus rep ---
**Author:** ![ReDevil](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/redevil/32/6385_2.png) [@ReDevil](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/ReDevil)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 9:48am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/why-richard-hates-koalas/254908/16 "2010-10-06T09:48:34Z")
Persons of the beige persuasion?