# Wiping, sitting or standing?
**URL:** https://forums.speedlife.net/t/wiping-sitting-or-standing/209899
**Category:** NYSpeed Off Topic
**Created:** [March 8, 2011, 8:02pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/wiping-sitting-or-standing/209899 "2011-03-08T20:02:52Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Karter](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Karter)
#### Post date: [March 8, 2011, 8:02pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/wiping-sitting-or-standing/209899/1 "2011-03-08T20:02:52Z")
on jeepforum, there was a large debate made by surprise surprise the penis wiping canadians, about how the proper way to wipe your ass is to stand up.
Which is fucking retarded, I lean to one side. Why? because I’m not 6.
Commence voting.
and my post from that thread over there after seeing 72 people voted that they stand.
> I don’t know how many objects 72 people insert for fun, but I do know when I stand up, my ass cheeks go together like they are supposed to, so in order to wipe like that, not only would I have to purposely spread a cheek apart, but I’d probabaly have to bend over forward too.
>
> None of those antics seem assanine to you guys? I mean you arent six, you lean to one side, which opens the area to wipe, and make sure you have it clean.
>
> I dont even like getting off the toilet when I have to waddle pants around the ankles butthole full of poo to the closet because I was over confident with what was remianing on the current roll, and my wife was at work.
>
> Its disgusting, and If I ever seen someone doing it in public, I’d probabaly tip them over, just because its ridiculous.
---
### Author:  [@vq30de](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/vq30de)
#### Post date: [March 8, 2011, 8:12pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/wiping-sitting-or-standing/209899/2 "2011-03-08T20:12:46Z")
> [@taxes, gas, nys budget](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/taxes-gas-nys-budget/209753/28):
>
> You DO NOT contribute to the forum in any way, every post you’ve ever made sucks.
WOW YOU ARE SO IMPORTANT TO THE NYSPEED COMMUNITY! THE FORUM WOULD IMPLODE WITHOUT POSTS LIKE THIS!!!
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### Author:  [@Karter](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Karter)
#### Post date: [March 8, 2011, 8:13pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/wiping-sitting-or-standing/209899/3 "2011-03-08T20:13:54Z")
> [@vq30de](#):
>
> WOW YOU ARE SO IMPORTANT TO THE NYSPEED COMMUNITY! THE FORUM WOULD IMPLODE WITHOUT POSTS LIKE THIS!!!
did you see how viral the do you wipe after you pee thread went?
Did you see how many pages of responses the thread got on jeepforum?
> **[Poop Remnant Elimination. (Sit vs. Stand)](https://www.jeepforum.com/threads/poop-remnant-elimination-sit-vs-stand.1178174/)**
Have you ever had a post or a thread that went anywhere rather it was good or bad. Its nice to know how important I am too you, see sig.
---
### Author:  [@vq30de](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/vq30de)
#### Post date: [March 8, 2011, 8:15pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/wiping-sitting-or-standing/209899/4 "2011-03-08T20:15:35Z")
Have you ever had a thread that didn’t end with people telling you you’re borderline illiterate and in general a complete loser?
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### Author:  [@Karter](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Karter)
#### Post date: [March 8, 2011, 8:17pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/wiping-sitting-or-standing/209899/5 "2011-03-08T20:17:36Z")
> [@vq30de](#):
>
> Have you ever had a thread that didn’t end with people telling you you’re borderline illiterate and in general a complete loser?
any thread I’ve ever made in general auto. You know the forum you don’t ever post in because you don’t have / do anything cool or car related. Go read your playgirl
---
### Author:  [@vq30de](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/vq30de)
#### Post date: [March 8, 2011, 8:21pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/wiping-sitting-or-standing/209899/6 "2011-03-08T20:21:18Z")
You’re so clever! Playgirl!? Did you think of that all by yourself?
I’ve been here and ubrf since 2002. My interest in cars gave way to a general interest in not being a car fag (like you) and focusing on a pretty cool career.
I’m reasonably sure that your auto threads ended in tears too…
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### Author:  [@bigwoode](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/bigwoode)
#### Post date: [March 8, 2011, 8:21pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/wiping-sitting-or-standing/209899/7 "2011-03-08T20:21:34Z")
Need a both option, depends.
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### Author:  [@Karter](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Karter)
#### Post date: [March 8, 2011, 8:29pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/wiping-sitting-or-standing/209899/8 "2011-03-08T20:29:51Z")
> [@vq30de](#):
>
> You’re so clever! Playgirl!? Did you think of that all by yourself?
>
> I’ve been here and ubrf since 2002. My interest in cars gave way to a general interest in not being a car fag (like you) and focusing on a pretty cool career.
>
> I’m reasonably sure that your auto threads ended in tears too…
I’m reasonably sure that if you had a cool career, you would have enough money to own a cool house and cool cars / toys. Instead what you meant to say was, you never get to do anything fun, or have anything cool so you come on nyspeed to whine. Its okay. You’ve been here since 2002 and havent posted one epic thread? Most of the members who left are better than you. I’d trade 100 yous for 1 justa4door
just stop posting period, nobody will even notice you’re gone.
> [@bigwoode](#):
>
> Need a both option, depends.
in the woods dosent apply lolol
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### Author:  [@Clean\_Baldy](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Clean_Baldy)
#### Post date: [March 9, 2011, 9:06am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/wiping-sitting-or-standing/209899/9 "2011-03-09T09:06:46Z")
Water paid for by my apartment?
CHECK
Toilet paper costs money?
CHECK
Shower right next to the toilet?
CHECK
Solution: Get naked, take dump, hop in shower, wipe ass with free water
CHECK
**_LIKE A BOSS_**
---
### Author:  [@tpgsr](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/tpgsr)
#### Post date: [March 9, 2011, 9:12am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/wiping-sitting-or-standing/209899/10 "2011-03-09T09:12:19Z")
:bigblap:
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### Author:  [@theblue](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/theblue)
#### Post date: [March 9, 2011, 10:16am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/wiping-sitting-or-standing/209899/11 "2011-03-09T10:16:58Z")
didn’t we have this thread here like 4+ years ago, or was that on ubrf?
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### Author:  [@newman](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/newman)
#### Post date: [March 9, 2011, 10:24am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/wiping-sitting-or-standing/209899/12 "2011-03-09T10:24:00Z")
> [@Karter"](#):
>
> I lean to one side.
This thread has made it clear that the ass-wiping stick may only be used from a seated position.
---
### Author:  [@Mike93](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Mike93)
#### Post date: [March 9, 2011, 10:33am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/wiping-sitting-or-standing/209899/13 "2011-03-09T10:33:04Z")
^something like that really exists? I’m guessing this is for insanely fat people who just can’t reach back there?
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### Author:  [@rdandy5875](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/rdandy5875)
#### Post date: [March 9, 2011, 10:41am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/wiping-sitting-or-standing/209899/14 "2011-03-09T10:41:51Z")
> [@Clean Baldy](#):
>
> Water paid for by my apartment?
>
> CHECK
>
> Toilet paper costs money?
>
> CHECK
>
> Shower right next to the toilet?
>
> CHECK
>
> Solution: Get naked, take dump, hop in shower, wipe ass with free water
>
> CHECK
>
> **_LIKE A BOSS_**
>
> 
Your method is flawed. You would need to dry off with a towel, which you would have to wash, and laundry soap costs money…
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### Author:  [@See4Ways](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/See4Ways)
#### Post date: [March 9, 2011, 11:05am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/wiping-sitting-or-standing/209899/15 "2011-03-09T11:05:00Z")
maybe it’s me but i just don’t understand threads like this. i realize its off topic but good god do you really want the answer to how do you wipe your ass from a bunch of dudes on a car forum?
But if it’s necessary i also enjoy that my shitter is next to my shower i usually am trained to shit when i get home at night and usually take a shower after cleaning up just because it feels better and im usually headed to the shower anyways. kills two birds with one stone. i usully plan on smashing out as well before bed so it’s just proper anyways.
this thread is fucking lamesauce 4 real.
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### Author:  [@NYstanger](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/NYstanger)
#### Post date: [March 9, 2011, 11:05am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/wiping-sitting-or-standing/209899/16 "2011-03-09T11:05:51Z")
> [@rdandy5875](#):
>
> Your method is flawed. You would need to dry off with a towel, which you would have to wash, and laundry soap costs money…
no need to wash a towel used to dry yourself since your clean and thus towel will stay clean
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### Author:  [@newman](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/newman)
#### Post date: [March 9, 2011, 11:10am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/wiping-sitting-or-standing/209899/17 "2011-03-09T11:10:36Z")
> [@NYstanger](#):
>
> no need to wash a towel used to dry yourself since your clean and thus towel will stay clean
That’s gross.
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### Author:  [@NYstanger](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/NYstanger)
#### Post date: [March 9, 2011, 11:13am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/wiping-sitting-or-standing/209899/18 "2011-03-09T11:13:30Z")
> [@vq30de](#):
>
> You’re so clever! Playgirl!? Did you think of that all by yourself?
>
> I’ve been here and ubrf since 2002. My interest in cars gave way to a general interest in not being a car fag (like you) and focusing on a pretty cool career.
>
> I’m reasonably sure that your auto threads ended in tears too…
What do you define as a car fag?
BTW, I resided in hell to. Like 8 years ago when I said that kinda shit on myspace.
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### Author:  [@Paulo](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Paulo)
#### Post date: [March 9, 2011, 12:18pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/wiping-sitting-or-standing/209899/19 "2011-03-09T12:18:18Z")
> [@NYstanger](#):
>
> no need to wash a towel used to dry yourself since your clean and thus towel will stay clean
> [@newman](#):
>
> That’s gross.
Seinfeld reference.
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### Author:  [@rdandy5875](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/rdandy5875)
#### Post date: [March 9, 2011, 1:07pm UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/wiping-sitting-or-standing/209899/20 "2011-03-09T13:07:06Z")
OMFG why did I just spend 15 minutes on amazon reading comfort wipe reviews??? FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
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