# Woo. That McCain. He's a funny one. **URL:** \ **Category:** NYSpeed Off Topic\ **Created:** [August 15, 2008, 9:42am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/woo-that-mccain-hes-a-funny-one/53295 "2008-08-15T09:42:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Fry](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/fry/32/7284_2.png) [@Fry](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Fry)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2008, 9:42am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/woo-that-mccain-hes-a-funny-one/53295/1 "2008-08-15T09:42:57Z")
> **Play of the Day: McCain the wisecracker** > > 34 minutes ago > ASPEN, Colo. (AP) — Move over Henny Youngman, John McCain is coming through. > The Republican presidential candidate has long been known for a sense of humor that includes cornball jokes and sharp zingers aimed at friends and foes alike. At a Thursday night fundraiser in Aspen, Colo., McCain crammed nearly a dozen of his favorite one-liners into a 17-minute speech, triggering sustained laughter from a crowd that, unlike the traveling staff and media, had not heard them all before. > > A sampling: > > Veteran fundraiser Fred Malek, who was in the crowd, started in Calvin Coolidge’s campaign. > > The McCain campaign’s near-collapse last summer confirmed Mao Zedong’s observation that “it’s always darkest before it’s completely black.” > > “Big Red,” last year’s prize boar at the Iowa State Fair, is now “Pepperoni.” > > Arizona is so dry, “the trees chase the dogs.” > > When the senator agreed with a California man who suggested “you look just like John McCain,” the man sympathized: “Doesn’t it just make you mad as hell?” > > “The good news is that we now have enough money to run the entire campaign in Colorado. The bad news is, some of that money is still in your wallets and purses.” > > And the always popular, “You know the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a scum-sucking bottom-dweller. The other is a fish.” > > Bada-bing. :lolno: :picard: [http://ap.google.com/article/ALeqM5gyXVIfZ2F2CTuuxH3\_93vuTP-ywwD92IQKFG1](http://ap.google.com/article/ALeqM5gyXVIfZ2F2CTuuxH3_93vuTP-ywwD92IQKFG1) ---
**Author:** ![EvilJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a5b964/32.png) [@EvilJay](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/EvilJay)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2008, 9:43am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/woo-that-mccain-hes-a-funny-one/53295/2 "2008-08-15T09:43:39Z")
God I hate this bumbling old man… ---
**Author:** ![Paulo](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/paulo/32/7328_2.png) [@Paulo](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Paulo)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2008, 9:46am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/woo-that-mccain-hes-a-funny-one/53295/3 "2008-08-15T09:46:33Z")
Electing McCain President would be like buying the loaf of bread that’s expiring the next day. Better use it fast. ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Stevil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/da6949/32.png) [@Dr.Stevil](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Dr.Stevil)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2008, 9:47am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/woo-that-mccain-hes-a-funny-one/53295/4 "2008-08-15T09:47:18Z")
lol I laughed ---
**Author:** ![Fry](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/fry/32/7284_2.png) [@Fry](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Fry)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2008, 9:48am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/woo-that-mccain-hes-a-funny-one/53295/5 "2008-08-15T09:48:10Z")
> [@Paulo](#): > > Electing McCain President would be like buying the loaf of bread that’s expiring the next day. Better use it fast. That’s actually a great analogy. He’d turn 76 in his 4th year. 76 is the current life expectancy of a white American male. ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Stevil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/da6949/32.png) [@Dr.Stevil](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Dr.Stevil)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2008, 9:49am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/woo-that-mccain-hes-a-funny-one/53295/6 "2008-08-15T09:49:23Z")
lol ib4wheatbreadjoke ---
**Author:** ![Blue\_Eyed\_Devil](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/blue_eyed_devil/32/7292_2.png) [@Blue\_Eyed\_Devil](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Blue_Eyed_Devil)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2008, 9:52am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/woo-that-mccain-hes-a-funny-one/53295/7 "2008-08-15T09:52:29Z")
He did say he was a one term pres. They may be a good thing, maybe they should all be one term. ---
**Author:** ![EvilJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a5b964/32.png) [@EvilJay](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/EvilJay)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2008, 9:54am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/woo-that-mccain-hes-a-funny-one/53295/8 "2008-08-15T09:54:10Z")
> [@AWDrifter](#): > > He did say he was a one term pres. > They may be a good thing, maybe they should all be one term. Perfect. Then you’re demographic couldn’t have re-elected Bush! ---
**Author:** ![Jam](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/jam/32/7235_2.png) [@Jam](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Jam)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2008, 9:54am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/woo-that-mccain-hes-a-funny-one/53295/9 "2008-08-15T09:54:21Z")
ive heard he is incapable of programing his vcr ---
**Author:** ![EvilJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a5b964/32.png) [@EvilJay](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/EvilJay)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2008, 9:55am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/woo-that-mccain-hes-a-funny-one/53295/10 "2008-08-15T09:55:16Z")
> [@Jam](#): > > ive heard he is incapable of programing his vcr Stop trying to look smart! You can’t do it either! The ritz dvd player flashed 12:00 for almost a year! ---
**Author:** ![Paulo](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/paulo/32/7328_2.png) [@Paulo](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Paulo)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2008, 9:55am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/woo-that-mccain-hes-a-funny-one/53295/11 "2008-08-15T09:55:25Z")
> [@AWDrifter](#): > > He did say he was a one term pres. > They may be a good thing, maybe they should all be one term. Or get voted out when the people see fit instead of having to wait for antoher election. That is to say the impeachment process should be much easier/faster. ---
**Author:** ![Nikuk](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/nikuk/32/7254_2.png) [@Nikuk](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Nikuk)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2008, 9:56am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/woo-that-mccain-hes-a-funny-one/53295/12 "2008-08-15T09:56:05Z")
ugh, IB4FryShould’vePostedThisInTheElectionThread ---
**Author:** ![Fry](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/fry/32/7284_2.png) [@Fry](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Fry)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2008, 10:00am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/woo-that-mccain-hes-a-funny-one/53295/13 "2008-08-15T10:00:56Z")
> [@Nikuk](#): > > ugh, IB4FryShould’vePostedThisInTheElectionThread :word: I guess I should have anticipiated it turning into a political debate rather than just “haha funny old man.” ---
**Author:** ![EvilJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a5b964/32.png) [@EvilJay](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/EvilJay)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2008, 10:01am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/woo-that-mccain-hes-a-funny-one/53295/14 "2008-08-15T10:01:20Z")
Sorry Fry, I tried. ---
**Author:** ![eclipsed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/bbce88/32.png) [@eclipsed](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/eclipsed)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2008, 10:01am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/woo-that-mccain-hes-a-funny-one/53295/15 "2008-08-15T10:01:35Z")
> [@EvilJay](#): > > you’re :picard: ---
**Author:** ![EvilJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a5b964/32.png) [@EvilJay](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/EvilJay)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2008, 10:05am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/woo-that-mccain-hes-a-funny-one/53295/16 "2008-08-15T10:05:41Z")
haha, god that’s disheartening. ---
**Author:** ![Blue\_Eyed\_Devil](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/blue_eyed_devil/32/7292_2.png) [@Blue\_Eyed\_Devil](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/Blue_Eyed_Devil)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2008, 10:07am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/woo-that-mccain-hes-a-funny-one/53295/17 "2008-08-15T10:07:01Z")
> [@EvilJay](#): > > Perfect. Then you’re demographic couldn’t have re-elected Bush! Why are you such a fag? ---
**Author:** ![EvilJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a5b964/32.png) [@EvilJay](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/EvilJay)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2008, 10:07am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/woo-that-mccain-hes-a-funny-one/53295/18 "2008-08-15T10:07:32Z")
I still like the McCain Ape Rape joke he tried to tell in texas. This guy has a tin ear for everything comedy related. ---
**Author:** ![EvilJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a5b964/32.png) [@EvilJay](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/EvilJay)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2008, 10:07am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/woo-that-mccain-hes-a-funny-one/53295/19 "2008-08-15T10:07:56Z")
> [@AWDrifter](#): > > Why are you such a fag? Because penis is delicious? :gotme: ---
**Author:** ![JayS](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex034/user_avatar/forums.speedlife.net/jays/32/15375_2.png) [@JayS](https://forums.speedlife.net/u/JayS)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2008, 10:07am UTC](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/woo-that-mccain-hes-a-funny-one/53295/20 "2008-08-15T10:07:56Z")
> [@Fry](#): > > That’s actually a great analogy. He’d turn 76 in his 4th year. 76 is the current life expectancy of a white American male. What’s the current life expectancy for rich white males? I bet it’s considerably higher. 😉 [Next page](https://forums.speedlife.net/t/woo-that-mccain-hes-a-funny-one/53295.md?page=2)