I need woman's rights jokes...ASAP.

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Why do women have boobs?

So you have something to look at when they are talking to you.

:lol: @ “Iron my shirt bitch”

What’s the smartest thing that ever came our of a womans mouth?

My dick.

lol at this thread, i love it

Yes!

Keep them coming…

Just walk up to her and ask “Shouldn’t you be barefoot and pregnant?”

what do 40 thousand battered women all have in common?

The don’t listen.

^I love that joke. The version I know:

The Department for Domestic Violence reports that there are approximately 30,000 cases reported annually of spousal abuse where the wife, fiance, or girlfriend was beaten by their partner. When director Frank Demonowski was asked what link do these occurances have in common he replied “These women did not listen the first time…”

Why do women get married in white?
So they match the kitchen appliances.

Whats the difference between your wife and your dog?
Walking the dog is relaxing.

What is the difference between a battery and a woman?
A battery has a positive side.

Why don’t women need drivers licenses?
There is no road between the bedroom and the kitchen.

How is a woman like a laxative?
They both irritate the crap out of you.

What do you do when your dishwasher breaks?
You hit her.

Women are cute and cuddly - every man should own one.

What do you call a woman with one black eye?
A fast learner.

What do you call a woman with 2 black eyes, and a fat lip? A slow learner…

Thanks so far guys…keep 'em comin! My goal is to either get this girl in hysteric tears, or so angry that she leaves the party we’ll both be at in the near future…or leaves in hysteric tears. That’d be the win.

Three blonde women find a genie’s urn. They open at the genie comes out and says I’ll grant you each one wish. The first says I want to be smart like a brunette. The genie says ok and turns her into a brunette. The second blonde says, I want to be smarter than her. So the genie turns her into a Redhead. The third blonde says well I want to be smarter than both of them. So the Genie says I can do that, and turns her into a man.

Why are wedding dresses white?

So they match the appliances.

^that one, going on my facebook wall

Oh god…

What does a woman and carpet have in common?
If you lay them right the first time, you can walk all over them later.

How can you tell if your wife is dead?
The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.

How many men does it take to change a light bulb?
None. Let the bitch do the ironing in the dark.

What do a woman and a condom have in common?
They’re both either in your wallet or on your dick.

How is a woman like a condom?
Both of them spend more time in your wallet than on your dick.

Why do men pay more than women for car insurance?
Because women don’t get blow jobs while they’re driving.

Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can’t even afford a washing machine will never be able to support you.

What are the three fastest means of communication?

  1. Internet
  2. Telephone
  3. Telawoman

You diss on your own species to fit in on a male dominated car forum yet you try to say I suck?

:bigclap:

ignore

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YES. BECAUSE I’M TRYING TO FIT IN, BY POSTING SOMETHING ON TOPIC WITH THE THREAD. AND LOL AT MY “OWN SPECIES.” HAHAHAHAHA. Gender, perhaps? What would you like me to do? Get all bent out of shape about JOKES!?