old news i know.
firstly, this a great great monologue:
But there are two different messages out there and 99% of them are this:
Robin Williams’s death: a reminder that suicide and depression are not selfish
and 1% are:
Robin Williams didn’t die from a disease, he died from his choice
http://themattwalshblog.com/2014/08/12/robin-williams-didnt-die-disease-died-choice/
–
your thoughts?
You asked for it…
I’ve never really had a great deal of compassion for people that make this choice. While I understand emotional pain can be overwhelming (like the loss of a loved one from illness or tragic accident) it is the easy way out. I had a close personal friend, who was shockingly similar to Robin Williams in that he was the “unrestrained clown” personality, life of the party, always happy, what have you. He hanged himself in the community building of his condo complex and had a wife and two young daughters, who were unlucky enough to find him. I felt a combination of both great sorrow, and anger, that he could leave his whole family to fend for themselves, financially and emotionally. I don’t know to this day if anyone understands the “why’s” behind his choice but while he was a good friend, I miss him and at the same time despise him for his actions.
Robin Williams had success, adoration of his fans, talent, financial wealth, and to my knowledge (correct me if I’m wrong) no major emotional loss outside the divorces he experienced. While I’m not happy to see him gone, should I feel sorrow for his decision?
Mental illness is a disease. Anyone that thinks differently, probably thinks guns are the problem with school shootings.
I read today the best description of depression that I’ve ever seen; “Telling someone to feel better with depression is like someone understanding that the earth has magnetic poles and asking them to just build a compass”.
The scariest part is if someone like Robin Williams can be that depressed that the only option he had was to end his life, what would it do to people like us?
my issue with this whole thing is romanticizing suicide by saying the guy is ‘free’ or ‘in a better place’…
there are ways to deal with, cope or cure depression… suicide is not one of them. Suicide only creates more depression and that is why it is selfish. i worry that others with depression will see this as being an easy way out by not seeing the negative fall-out of suicide and instead only seeing the adoration for the departed.
+1. It’s incredibly hard for people to comprehend depression. It’s more than “Oh, he’s just kinda stressed”.
Imagine being physically tortured to the point where you would wish it would just be done. Apply that to the mind and you get how it works.
Some great points made so far…but I fall more in the camp of 1QIKZ’s take on it…
One of my closest friends of nearly 20 years took his own life on 3/15/12. I still think about him every day, and just recently we had a 3rd annual balloon release on what would have been his 38th birthday…it tears me up that he is gone, but especially in the way he went…losing someone important to suicide is hard…especially bec. those in that person’s life will forever wonder what they could have done to prevent it, even though, logically, there is nothing you can do…but it truly leaves a trail of destruction behind, and helps no one…
If you’re far enough along that you’re actually contemplating suicide, Robin Williams’ actions aren’t going to influence you one way or another.
You’re saying that there are cures for depression. As a person who has never had to deal with it. A clear thinking, well minded individual. You’re trying to read into something, which can’t be read in to;
“Why’d she kill her four kids if she didn’t want them? She could’ve put them up for adoption.” “Why wouldn’t she leave him, if he keeps beating her up?” etc. etc.
Any interview I’ve heard from someone who failed at killing themselves, seems to have the same mantra. “It was the only way to fix my problems, until I actually jumped/pulled the trigger/took the pills and then I realized the finality of my actions and all of a sudden my problems weren’t so bad.”
There’s a difference between being sad and upset and having a mental illness
Some people get mad at people with mental illness but no one seems to get mad at people with cancer. Weird.
Didn’t you know, mental illness is a choice ! /pinkfont
I very strongly disagree with this. I do personally know people close to me who are going through depression for years and who have spoken about suicide and that is why i have such an issue with romantizing robin william’s death in the media… it is a glaring reminder to anyone with any suicidal thoughts and suggests that people will only remember the good you did in life while ignoring all of the dramatic consequences of ending your life.
Contemplating suicide is not usually a spur of the moment thing… it takes months or even years to build up to it and anything that suggests suicide may be a good option is a bad thing.
Robin could have come out and been a poster boy for depression in a positive way instead of being another victim of it. he was good enough to be that.
Generally speaking “talking about suicide” is more of a cry for help, than actually having suicidal tendencies. If you’re going to kill yourself, something in the media isn’t going to push you to do it. This isn’t buying a pair of shoes that your favorite Kardashian was seen wearing. Bottom line, if you’re sick enough to kill youself, you’re beyond media influence.
I couldn’t have said this any better myself.
As someone who’s battled this my entire life… ended my life once already and was revived… This is one of those “illnesses”, “diseases”, etc that until you’ve live in this persons life for years, felt the emotions they’ve felt, been through the life experiences they have you have ZERO idea what it’s like.
I also completely agree with the other point being made of people who talk about suicide are typically looking for some sort of positive attention to help them get through a deep part of their depression cycle. Once someone is beyond the point of talking about it/asking about it, the silence starts… the part where everything seems normal or even improving with the person. This is actually the start of the end… the decision has already been made and the knowledge that peace is finally coming to them takes over; the planning for how to do it, timing, etc.
I see a lot of you talk about the selfishness and damage it causes. what you don’t realize is to the person committing suicide this isn’t selfish at all; they TRULY and whole heartedly believe that everyone in their lives would be better off without them. There are exceptions to this, and normally it’s one or two people; but still, in their mind, them being gone is better for the people left behind.
the other issue i have with all this is again the message it sends to those suffering from depression that no matter how much money, fame, privilege etc. etc. you have… if Robin Williams can’t beat it… how they hell can anyone else???
again, i think of the people in my life going through this and I worry about what their nights are like after watching this Robin Williams stuff all evening… i just got off the phone with one of those people i think of… we spoke about it for 40 minutes.
There’s one major flaw in the statement above… there is no “beating it”… there’s just living with it, and figuring out how to deal with it on a day by day basis; the battle with depression never ends, it just cycles between being “easy” to deal with one day, to being super rough the next. Just because someone is fine this week, year, decade, etc; doesn’t mean that something will shift and they’ll be deep in the trenches and nearing their breaking point again.
Bing, I HIGHLY respect you for the 2nd part of your quote though… being there for people who are battling this every day means more than you can imagine on the other end. Just the ability to be there and care enough about that person to listen to them and talk with them can and a lot of times does make the depth and/or duration of the down cycle easier to climb out of/move out of quicker.
I think it will take few generations until depression will be fully accepted as a disease by the public. You have to be really very close to someone to really see it.
I newer knew gangster or other sob that suffered depression and two friends that I’ve lost were very intelligent, educated, popular and everybody thought that there is nothing bad going on in theirs lives.
Both of them men and very talented musicians who never complained about anything. I wish they cried in my shoulders like a girls and I could help them somehow.
If you don’t get it, please don’t judge and be happy that it didn’t happened to you.
Yeah, I am quoting myself. Speaking of this kind of logic, my wife gets mad at me when I can’t hear her. I always say, “Do you get mad at blind people too or just people who can’t hear?”
Guys you’re using mental illness in a very broad way. It covers many types of behaviour, this is about his depression. You’re then calling all these a disease. By definition this is not a disease and enabling it as one namely depression that leads to suicide does not help the situation. I’m not speaking from a purely observational point of view either. Hopelessness is a dark place to be.
By calling it a disease you’re saying it is a brain disorder, something that is physically wrong with part of the brain. Does this not all sound like the road to shock therapy in the early 20s and lobotomies?
You know what I hate to read in these conversations, when people say, if you don’t agree with x then you are one of those who agree with some outlandish behaviour y. Such a weak way of attacking someone.Thinking like that should be called a disease.
Seeing all the people who’s lives he touched speak about him after he passed really makes you think. If only people on the edge could see that kind of outpouring of support before they choose suicide maybe it would change their view of hopelessness.
If there’s one thing to take away from this hopefully it’s that people who know someone who is struggling will take the time to talk to them before they’re gone.
The only thing I can think about is how someone who spent their whole life making other people laugh and someone who was so full of cheer all the time, how could they be so dark on the inside? The only answer is that it was a sickness. A sickness driven by fame, drugs and the direct result of always being in the spotlight or the lack of towards the end of their career.
I feel bad more for his family. I read this during my morning coffee and I instantly felt sadness for his kids & wife. http://zeldawilliams.tumblr.com/
It’s just such a shame that something so selfish, preventable, disturbing, whatever adjective you want to use to describe it, can affect so many other innocent people.
iu
You have some who call it selfish. You have some who say it is sad and unfortunate. Regardless of what he did, I feel bad for the family for now having to answer, or be looked to for answers on why his life ended the way it did.