35 Reasons Men > Women


  1. We keep our last name.
  2. The garage is all ours.
  3. Wedding plans take care of themselves.
  4. Chocolate is just another snack.
  5. We can be president.
  6. We can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
  7. Car mechanics tell us the truth.
  8. The world is our urinal.
  9. We never have to drive to another gas station because this one’s just too icky.
  10. Same work, more pay.
  11. Wrinkles add character.
  12. Wedding dress - $5000; tux rental - $100.
  13. People never stare at our chest when we’re talking to them.
  14. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
  15. New shoes don’t cut, blister, or mangle our feet.
  16. One mood, ALL the time.
  17. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
  18. We know stuff about tanks.
  19. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
  20. We can open all our own jars.
  21. We get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
  22. If someone forgets to invite us, he or she can still be our friend.
  23. Our underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
  24. Everything on our face stays its original color.
  25. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
  26. We don’t have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
  27. We almost never have strap problems in public
  28. We are unable to see wrinkles in our clothes.
  29. The same hair style lasts for years, maybe decades.
  30. We don’t have to shave below our neck.
  31. Our belly usually hides our big hips.
  32. One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons.
  33. We can “do” our nails with a pocket-knife.
  34. We have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
  35. We can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives, on December 24, in 45 minutes.

Correct.

LOL…But the garage isn’t always the guys… :hsugh:

hahah… so true!

:rofl:

quality! :rofl: i saw one like that cept it had
“you think the idea of punting a small dog is funny” &
“you’ll grow up to be a dirty old man”

need = I want
We need = I want
It’s your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now
Do whatever you want = You are going to pay for this later
We need to talk = I need to complain
Sure…go ahead = I don’t want you to
I’m not upset = Of course I’m upset, you moron!
You’re so manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot
You’re certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about?
I’m not emotional! And I’m not overreacting! = I have a severe case of PMS
Be romantic, turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs
This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house
I want new curtains = I want new curtains, new carpeting, new furniture, new wallpaper…
I need new shoes = the other 40 pairs are simply the wrong shade
I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep
Do you love me? = I’m going to ask for something expensive
How much do you love me? = I did something today you’re really going to hate
I’ll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on T.V.
Is my butt fat? = Tell me I’m beautiful
You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me
Are you listening to me? = Too late, you’re dead
Yes = No
No = No
Maybe = No
I’m sorry = You’ll be sorry
I was wrong = Not as wrong as you
Do you like this recipe? = It’s easy to fix, so you’d better get used to it
Was that the baby? = Why don’t you get out of bed and walk him until he goes to sleep
I’m not yelling! = Of course I’m yelling, this is important!

OH crap!!!..You have finally cracked the women’s code to annoying the shit out of there men… Now we have to come up with new ones LOL - :wink:

thanks for posting that. Never seen it before. :hsugh: