Beer/Vagina showdown

  1. Beer is always wet. Vagina needs a little work.
    One point to BEER

  2. Warm beer tastes awful.
    One point to VAGINA

  3. A really cold beer is satisfying.
    One point to BEER

  4. If after taking a swig of your favorite beer you find a hair between your teeth, you may vomit.
    One point to VAGINA

  5. If you get home reeking of beer your wife may get mad, make a scene, kick you out, etc. If you get home reeking of vagina your wife may get mad, kick you out, even leave you. There’s definitely a point to be had here, depending on your point of view and personal circumstances.
    I’ll just call it a DRAW for the time being.

  6. Ten beers in one night and you can’t drive home. Ten vaginas in one night and you don’t want to drive anywhere.
    One point to VAGINA

  7. If you have a lot of beer in a public place, your reputation may suffer. If you eat any vagina in public, you become a legend.
    One point to VAGINA

  8. If a cop stops you and you smell of beer you may get arrested. If you smell of vagina he may buy you a beer.
    One point to VAGINA

  9. You normally don’t find old beer.
    One point to BEER

  10. Too much beer and you’ll think you see flying saucers. Too much vagina and you’ll think you’ve seen God.
    One point to VAGINA

  11. Ripping off a beer bottle label is boring. Ripping off panties is fun.
    One point to VAGINA

  12. In most countries there’s a tax on beer.
    One point to VAGINA

  13. If you have another beer the first one never gets pissed off.
    One point to BEER

  14. You can always be sure if you’re the first one to open a bottle or a can.
    One point to BEER

  15. If you shake beer it’ll get all agitated but eventually it settles down.
    One point to BEER

  16. With beer you always have choice: clear, dark, pilsner, ale, lager, etc.
    One point to BEER

  17. You always know how much beer is going to cost.
    One point to BEER

  18. Beer doesn’t have a mother.
    One point to BEER

  19. Beer never expects to be hugged for half an hour after you
    drink it.
    One point to BEER

FINAL SCORE: BEER: 10 VAGINA: 8

That’s it! The matter is settled, the clear winner is: BEER

PS: If you are a woman and at this point feel angry, degraded or discriminated against, just remember that Beer would experience none of those feelings, let alone express them.
An extra point for BEER!

Not saying i agree, vagina > beer IMO just thought it was funny

:tup: good stuff.

you are obviously young, or dont get laid a lot.

they’re both great.
I’ll add two for vagina and then they’ll be even.

  1. You can’t put your dick in a beer can.
    One point to VAGINA

  2. Human life doesn’t come out of beer bottles, cans or kegs.
    One point to VAGINA

there. 10-10. perfect.

i beg to differ. i am sure there are a few kids on this forum who wouldnt exist if it werent for beer.

beer gives life

But bottles, cans, and kegs lead to a lot of new unexpected human life
-2 Points BEER

Edit: Damn you beat me to it

14, and i touched my first boob last week so IN YOUR FACE!!!

i dunno jan. usually when i’m in the act i’m not like HEY HUMAN LIFE COMES OUT OF HERE

that thought doesn’t get me all psyched about vagina. nor does it make me want a beer.

that’s awesome. i swear that is going to go through my head the next time i’m all flagrante delicto and i’ll be like well this concept is just a boner killer all right thanks jan :tup:

yessss. I love ruining other peoples’ sexual experiences.

I guess it all depends on the vagina in question…

if youre a single guy who doesnt want kids, this is one point for BEER

  1. Warm beer tastes awful.
    One point to VAGINA

not true. really good beer tastes wonderful warm.

beer is never not in the mood

beer doesnt bleed

Beer wont give you STD’s.

beer doesn’t have PMS, moods swings or cramps
+3 points for beer

beer doesn’t mind when you drink her sister
+1 for beer

a big beer is better then a small one +1 beer

you can either take your time with beer or slam it down really fast n it wont care eihter way +1 beer

okay okay. beer wins.

Beer will always win. :slight_smile:

jan picks beer over vagina

choosing alcohol over your girl junk :tup:

i always knew jan was a smart one…

beer wont lie about you behind your back

beer wont talk shit about you then text you for sex