REPOST MOFUGGA!
http://nyspeed.com/forums/showthread.php?t=72203&highlight=trolling
Only because I dont get to do this often!
:repost:
I guess I dont title my threads in an appealing enough way 
I bumped that shit mid day like 3 times.
Buzzkill out!
you need to add more versus.
LMAO!!! :lol:
yes, it’s catching on! :lol:
Original ad:
PARROT WANTED
I am looking for a parrot for my two children. I used to have a parrot and loved her and would love to see my kids have one. Really any kind of parrot will do. I have a vet that can check it out - please email me if you have a parrot you don’t want!
Thanks!
From Me to *****@.org
Hi there!
I have an African Grey parrot that my wife and I do not want anymore. It would be great for your kids! Let me know if you want him.
Mike
From Sandra ********* to Me
Mike - tell me about your parrot! How old is he? Do you have any pictures of him? Why do you want to get rid of him?
From Me to Sandra ***********
Sandra,
My parrot is 2 years old. I don’t have any pictures, but he looks like a typical parrot.
We are getting rid of him because my wife does not like him. My wife and I argue a lot, and the parrot seems to have picked up some of the things I have said and just shouts them at my wife when she walks by. I think the final straw was when the parrot called her a “stupid fat twat.” She takes it personally, even though I tell her that she shouldn’t be self-conscious just because a parrot thinks she is fat. Now I will admit that I trained it to say “nice cellulite, bitch” whenever my wife walks by, but the parrot pretty much just curses at everyone now. Whenever I walk in the door, it calls me a “cocksucking grundle licker.” It kind of gets annoying when it is the first thing I hear after working all day.
Also, I let my friend watch the parrot for a week when I was on vacation, and ever since then, the parrot sings “The Final Countdown” by Europe every night at 4 in the morning. It often wakes me up and I am tired of it. I don’t even like that song.
The parrot also has an issue with defecating in its cage. It will wait until I let it out, and then immediately fly over to the kitchen and shit on my food. If I don’t let him out, he starts yelling “I have to shit!” until I let him out. It can go on for hours.
My wife pretty much told me either the parrot goes, or she will leave me. So I have no choice but to get rid of him. His name is Sam. I think he will be great for your kids, as long as they aren’t fat and won’t take the insults he yells at them personally.
I can set up a time for you to come check him out this week if you want. What day works for you?
Mike
From Sandra ********* to Me
Mike, I don’t think that parrot would be appropriate for my kids - they are only five and seven years old.
From Me to Sandra ***********
Sandra,
I think he would be great for your kids. I didn’t mean to scare you off with the bad description of the parrot. He really is a nice parrot. There is a way to prevent him from shouting obscenities. I found that if I soak his food in drain cleaner and then give it to him, it burns up his throat and he doesn’t talk for a few days. I can include a bottle of Draino and a few bags of bird food with him, if you want.
Mike
From Sandra ********* to Me
Are you serious? That can kill him!! He sounds like he was a nice parrot but you have no idea how to take care of him! Give him to the SPCA!
From Me to Sandra ***********
Excuse me? I know how to take care of a parrot. It sounds like you don’t know how to take care of your kids if you are always turning down free, lovable pets for them. THAT can kill their spirits. Why even put an ad up if you aren’t willing to be reasonable? Sorry this parrot isn’t perfect. You can’t expect people to give you Toucan fucking Sam for free.
I can’t take him to the SPCA. They told me never to come back after I tried to give them a bunch of rats that my rat trap caught but didn’t kill.
If you don’t take my parrot, I’m afraid my only option is to release him into my backyard, and then shoot him with my shotgun for sport.
From Sandra ********* to Me
You are a f*cking lunatic.
From Me to Sandra ***********
Sandra please take my parrot. I just checked and I don’t have any more birdshot shells for my gun. Please don’t make me have to drive all the way to Delaware to get more.
http://www.dontevenreply.com/view.php?post=82
Bump…he emailed JEG!
^ I don’t know whats funnier, the prank or the landscapers 4th grade intelligence.
Edit: or this comment
Sriram (2010-01-26 12:53:07)
In Soviet Russia, grille steal you!
amazing.
lol, these were fucking hilarious
good find joe! :lol:
lol at the landscape one
Fucking LOL
I love this god damn site
This guy is hilarious
Barely Legal Little League
Posted at: 2009-11-25 02:31:59
Original ad:
We are a little league team looking for a sponsor for the upcoming season. Email if you are interested in helping out. Thanks!
From Me to @***.org
Good afternoon,
I came across your ad looking for a sponsor for your little league team. I am interested if you still need one. Let me know, and we can discuss the details.
Thanks,
Mike
From Joe ********* to Me:
Hey Mike,
My name is Joe. I have been the coach of this team and greatly appreciate the offer. We still do need a sponsor and I would like to hear what you have to offer. The league will not start up again until mid-April so we will have some time. Let me know what you were thinking for sponsorship, you can email or call me anytime at ()-****
Thanks,
Joe
From Me to Joe *********:
Joe,
I am glad to hear you are still interested. I would like to have my company name on your team’s uniform and fence sign. How much would it cost to do this?
Mike
From Joe ********* to Me:
Hi Mike,
The cost to fully sponsor our team would be $800. It would cover ordering the jerseys and equipment. At the end of the season you will be recognized at our ceremony and will receive a framed photo of the team and your own uniform. What is your company’s name and do you have a website?
Thanks,
Joe
From Me to Joe *********:
That sounds reasonable Joe. I am the founder of an adult film company called BarelyLegalSuperSluts. We specialize in 18+ amateur pornography and I would like to get our name out there. We plan on lanuching our site around April, so I think the timing would be perfect with your league. I can forward you our logo and we will discuss designs for the uniforms.
Mike
From Joe ********* to Me:
Mike,
Do you realize this sponsorship is for a little league team?
Joe
From Me to Joe *********:
Yes, you told me that. I think it is great that I’ll be able to help kids enjoy America’s greatest pastime.
From Joe ********* to Me:
and you honestly expect a bunch of kids to be sporting a jersey that says Barely Legal Super Sluts?
From Me to Joe *********:
Is it too long to fit on the jersey? We could just call them the Super Sluts for short as long as the sign on the field included the link to our website.
From Joe ********* to Me:
No that isn’t the problem. This team is for kids and we can’t have them wearing shirts that say Super Sluts on them. It is highly offensive and the league most likely wouldn’t even allow it.
From Me to Joe *********:
How about we call them the Barely Legal Little Leaguers? I would include a free copy of our Super Sluts Slurping Loads DVD for every parent that attends the game. The DVD features over 3 hours of sluts with hilarious outtakes and alternate endings. I could even have a few of our stars come out and mud wrestle during the 7th inning stretch. I think it could pull in a lot more of an audience for your little league.
From Joe ********* to Me:
No! Thats even worse! Look Mike I appreciate you trying to help our team out but this is absolutely the wrong place to be advertising your porn. If you would still like to contribute you can but we cannot have your company name associated with our team.
From Me to Joe *********:
If this is how you treat every sponsor that wants to help your team out, you will never get any money. Sooner or later you are going to have to whore yourself out to someone, which is a valuable lesson learned in my Big Sluts: Big Loads DVD. I could give that one out to the parents instead, due to the educational value.
From Joe ********* to Me:
You just dont quit do you? Aint happening so go to hell!
LOL
^ Ahaha
:lol: ^^
im dying from these… hahaha
Bump from Joelster’s post, we are dying here at work