That have the smallest amount of authority piss me right the fuck off.
No, I don’t want to hear about how shitty your kids are, unless she’s 18 and you are going to give me her number, no I don’t want to hear how you got scammed on your mortguage (pay a-fucking-tention to the fine print you stupid whore, you can’t afford to leave in EA on a combined income of fuck-all), No, I don’t know who your husband is at the company and I don’t fucking care. Sure, I’ll drop what I’m doing and help you put up posters for the dress down day on Friday, wait, you can fucking eat a dick, I don’t care about that bullshit. Jeans at work are for scrubs/the night crew/and people working in food service… Yes please, I’d love some of the brownies you sat up last night baking for everyone while you ignored your children and husband becase you have a crush on some fat guy in the office, Wait, wait wait, you dumb twatwaffle, I said I’d have one, I didn’t say that I wanted to hear about how painstaking it was for you to prepare them, they’re fucking brownies from a box and I. Don’t. Care. You also have no idea how little I care about your car problems, yes, I am in fact a car guy, no, I do not have a spare set of tires for your car kicking around, no, I refuse to do the brakes on your 2007 Tahoe for $50…those are friend prices and you are the furthest thing from what I consider a friend, I could care less about your car payment, and don’t you even start bitching about gas again, you clearly can’t afford the car, buy a fucking hyundai and crash it into a telephone pole.
No, you’re not in charge of me…even thought you made some awesome powerpoint showing the chain of command at the company. I only work for 1 person, and you sure as fuck aren’t that guy, although you could fool me with that awesome mustache you’re working on you stupid-menopause suffering-1980’s business woman dressing-stupid as the day you were born-not knowing how to use a computer-shoulder pad wearing-kitten poster hanging-activity committee leading-brownie cooking-child ignoring-husband bashing failure of a life.
Kill yourself and everyone you love.
Peace, Love, and fuck the fuck off,
EvilJay
/rant
