Slamburglars Handbook.

Shift518 Automotive
1

Some are pretty funny, others are just outrageous.

Slamburglars Handbook

  1. Shock travel is for bitches.
  2. Dumped so low the panties practically fall off.
  3. If your car is drivable, you’re not low enough.
  4. We use pinch welds for parking brakes.
  5. Slamburglars don’t get stuck on speed bumps, speed bumps get stuck on Slamburglars.
  6. Tuckin wheels and copin feels
  7. Dumpin whips and stealin chicks.
  8. Tire stretching and pussy popping.
  9. Guilty of Slamburglary.
  10. Because its not cool to be high.
  11. g-codes and g-strings.
    12a. There is no such thing as too low.
    12b. There is no such thing as low enough.
  12. Whats “out of spec”?
  13. We like our girls how we like our cars, HAMMERED.
  14. It’s not so bad being down & out.
  15. slamburglars, aka THE FRAME BANG GANG.
  16. The lower you go, the better it feels.
  17. Doin things, Cuttin springs.
  18. Doin work, Scrapin dirt.
  19. Slamburglars have their passengers sit in the back left and rub in the front right.
  20. Oil pans are scheduled maintenance.
  21. Fuck bitches, get coils.
  22. Wheel gap is for ///M owners.
  23. Dump or Die.
  24. It’s nice to MEAT you.
  25. Innocent until proven GUILTY.
  26. Beware of the liftburglars.
  27. Invite only.
  28. The home of bad taste and poor geometry.
  29. Our nightmares consist of potholes and speed bumps.
  30. MO’ LOW MO’ MONEY MO’ BITCHES
  31. Like your SAT scores…so low you cant go anywhere.
  32. Scraping more pans than the food network.
  33. We slam our cars almost as hard as we slam muff.
  34. If sparks dont fly, your rides too high.
  35. thuggish ruggish tire scrubin.
  36. never doubt The Professor.
  37. gun bucking and car hucking
  38. turning heads for all the wrong reasons.
  39. We like our girls how we like our tires, SMOKIN.
  40. Low Ballin and Street Crawlin.
  41. We like our cars how we like our girlfriends, DUMPED.
  42. If it’s not slammed, what’s the point?
  43. perches are for birds, collars are for dogs.
  44. No switches, Mo Bitches
  45. If you have to ask, GTFO.
  46. Keeping it durty, down to the floor.
  47. aka the lane marker fucker uppers49. aka the rim tuck fuck club
  48. aka the pan slam clan
  49. SlamBurglars cant light bon fires
  50. dumpin’ n fist pumpin’

Vot’s bible :lol

2

HAHAHAHA
ya caught meh!
also 29= ROFL

3

lol’d HARD at these

  1. Tuckin wheels and copin feels
  2. Dumpin whips and stealin chicks.
4
  1. Beware of the liftburglars.

:rofl

5

I personally giggled at

“10. Because its not cool to be high.”

Alpineskiier will not approve :lol

6

there is nothing in that list that i do not approve of.

7

Like your SAT scores…so low you cant go anywhere.

:rofl

8

thankfully i approve of the reference, but i had high sat scores :lol

9

:lol

10
  1. If your car is drivable, you’re not low enough.

Do work Elliot, Do work! If you aren’t hardparking, you aren’t slamming.

11

but my car will always be driven, even when it is considered by 99% of people to be undrivable.

12

thats EXACTLY the kind of thing we like to see :thumbup
well, at least I do, anyways…