I will say a combo of A and B.
Put in your 2 weeks, like a good corporate citizen.
Then proceed to answer calls like normal, but if you come across (Ms. Wheres the any key?) Then you politely say you are a retard and move onto the next call. And things of that nature.
Talk down to and use big words to as many customers as you can.
Have many subtle arguments but always in a cheerful voice and throw in things like DIAF, but don’t tell them what it means.
You are a creative guy I’m sure you can think of many more ways to be a complete asshole to as many people as possible with out getting directly fired for it. And if you do, o-well at least you have a fall back plan.