What fights would you like to see?

[JClark]

If Benjamin insists upon continuing this provocation, I will be forced to continue to defend myself in the manner previously described.

@JClark

Benjamin - I warn you not to continue your smear campaign against my reputation, my honor, and my legacy on this earth. Your unprofessional behavior through this has been appalling and your ghastly retelling of our recent encounter is pure fallacy. The jackets were most certainly constructed of a dyed natural cowhide - NOT the “pleather” you refer to.

Be assured and forewarned that my trebuchet is not a subject of laughter or childish hyperbole. It is over 8 fathoms high, constructed of thick, creeky timber, and is quintessential ‘Lord of the Rings’ up in this bitch. According to Google Maps, your new place of residence is a mere 5 miles from my fortress as the crow flies. I could walk it in nary a fortnight. BE ASSURED, once again, Benjamin, that I chunks of castle wall, rotting fruit, my neighbors obnoxious dog, and other unsavory items can easily rain down upon you with a mere snap of fingers.

I trust that you will now be a gentleman about the situation and dissuade your short, white, Italian males and their ferrets against further exacerbation of the present situation. I have tried to resolve this peacefully and privately but I will defend myself as necessary if I am further provoked. Beest thou a homo no longer.

With best intentions,
Jesse Q Clark, III. Esq.