What the fuck

Shift518 Automotive Shift518 Off Topic
1

Why is it today that every time I drink a little bit of water, my stomach cramps up and I have to take a shit? I ate a bowl of Life cereal this morning, took a piss, and began working on my garage. About 10 mins later, I got a bottle of water and not 30 seconds after I drank some of it, I had to take a big poop.

Deposited waste in toilet, and resumed work. Took another drink of water, and AGAIN same thing! Within 30 seconds, stomach cramps up and I am forced to drop another bomb in the bathroom.

After the 3rd time I just stopped drinking anything. As I am sitting here, I am feeling my stomach cramp up like I have to shit, and then go away after 30 seconds or so.

Am I pregnant? WHAT IS GOING ON! :wtf2

2

Yikes… Is the water old? It would probably take years and years for it to grow enough bacteria to do that, but it seems feasible.

3

Not at all, it’s bottled water that I just bought at the supermarket a few days ago.

4

Is it the same time everyday that you have the water? Also you may be dehydrated slightly.

5

You need lots of help.

6

It’s not an everyday thing, it just happened this morning. I’ll pound some more poland spring and see (feel?) what happens

7

youve got aids

8

If I were you I would end my life. Just saying

9

Hmm…

10

Sounds like you were taking drugs. Do anything opium based lately? Codeine?

11

Nah bro he just does coke

12

O… right right

but seriously, when i got the flu my doctor gave me tylenol three which has codeine in it and that shit fucks up your digestive track

13

If you take enough, you done pewp for five days. Trust.

14

cool my useless threads blow yours out the fuckin water…

15

True Peter, I would rather read about a bloomin onion than why skiier’s body is retarded

16

thanks and my threads are short and TO THE FUCKIN POINT.

17

and easily found on google

18

Bwah. Useless banter FIGHT!

19

http://img31.imageshack.us/img31/7677/1275813485144.jpg

20

As is your thought process.

No, I don’t do drugs. I forgot I ate a lot of oreos and chips+dip before bed last night, so that probably had something to do with it. :rofl