Obviously a honda lover wrote this, but it is still funny.
How a Honda employee bakes a potato:
Preheat new, high-quality oven to 350 F. Insert Idaho potato. Go do something
productive for 45 minutes. Check for doneness, and then Remove perfectly baked
potato from oven and serve.
How a GM employee bakes a potato:
Instruct an Idaho potato supplier to preheat the oven to 350 F. Demand that the
supplier show you how he turned the dial to reach 350F, and have him come up
with documentation from the oven manufacturer proving that it was calibrated
properly. Review documentation, then have supplier check the temperature using
sophisticated temperature probe. Direct supplier to insert potato and set timer
for 45 minutes. Have supplier open oven to prove potato has been installed
correctly, and request a free study proving that 45 minutes is the ideal time to
bake a potato of this size.
Check potato for doneness after 10 minutes.
Check potato for doneness after 11 minutes.
Check potato for doneness after 12 minutes.
Become impatient with supplier (why is this simple potato taking so long to
bake?). Demand status reports every five minutes. Check potato for doneness
after 15 minutes… After 35 minutes, conclude that potato is nearing
completion. Congratulate supplier, and then update your boss on all the great
work you’ve done, despite having to work with such an uncooperative supplier.
Remove potato from oven after 40 minutes of baking, as a cost savings; without
loss of function or quality versus the original 45 minute baking time. Serve
potato. Wonder aloud what on earth those Japanese folks are doing over there to
make such good low-cost baked potatoes that people seem to like better than GM
potatoes.
Daimler Chrysler’s Baked Potatoes:
Design great looking potato. Include sour cream, bacon bits, chives, and cheese.
Bean counters then create MCM system. Engineers spend 2 years looking for ways
to take out sour cream, bacon bits, chives, and cheese. Engineers find cheap
imitation chives from Japanese supplier. Management commands engineers to use
expensive, over-engineered German bacon bits To help prop up weak German
suppliers. Sell potato with cheap imitation chives, no sour cream, cheese or
expensive German bacon bits. Potato rots so fast customer swears never to buy
another DCX potato.
Ford’s Baked Potatoes:
Engineers create plain looking, “everyman” potato. Sold as “green” alternative
to French Fries. When micro waved, potato explodes, causing death and injury to
customers and bringing end to 100-year potato and butter-supplier relationship,
Lawyers flourish.
