Okay, I want to hear you funniest party stories, whether it is pain, humor, humilitation or a combination it has to be funny…
not the funniest thing in the world…but…funny to anyone who has ever altered their state of conscoiusness.
I was sitting talking to this girl who was telling me that she does not drink or smoke or do anything to alter her mind because she doesn’t want to hurt her body. So we begin talking about what would happen if something altered your mind and did not harm your body. I then told her that I found a way to get you stoned without smoking or injesting THC into your lungs, so as not to hurt you, but alter your mind and get you high. I then told her that i was retarded high off of this Visine that i put pure THC into. I showed her the bottle and told her it was just like smoking without all the bad side effects and asked her if she would like to try it. she put two drops in each eye and began(literally 5 minutes later) to stumble around the party telling people she was high and that I found the purest form of THC and put it into this Visine that I had. she then gathered about 6 other girls who flocked to me wanting to try my “HighVisine”
The funniest part is that these 6 or 7 girls all then sat around acting high and laughing and being retarded, like most people do when they get stoned.
…here is the best part…I then gathered all of them together, before i left and told them that they are all stupid for being so gullible and acting high when in fact they were nothing more than 6 sober girls with perfectly clear eyes…
I had a party once. My friend passed out and ended up using a toilet as his pillow. His hand was in puke water. We made a sign that said “Will work for Beer” and put it next to him. Pictures were taken. I wish I could find them right now!
at beerfest 2005 i showed up around 3 or 4 pm to help set things up, after realizing we had a crow bar to dig the holes to set the dj booth poles into, i started drinking,
by 9 oclock i was passed out on the flower bed
at 11 oclock i awoke in the house on the dining room floor
a 3 am i awoke on the couch, now quite sober and wondering how i got there
i stand up ready to go party again … as soon as i stand up i realise it feels like i have a pin coushin stuck in my ass cheeks … i start to scrath it amd i mumble “wtf?”
thats when i was told by the coolest party mom i know … that she has a CACTUS in the flower bed i was sleeping on. upon further inspect i realize that this cactus is quite large and smushed into the dirt
i still occasionaly have to dig a thorn out of my ass
my most recent was the typical permanent marker penis on face on my roommate’s face. he walked home at 5AM thru the streets of buffalo, past campus security and whoever else with a dick on his face, totally oblivious. not original i know, but it had to be funny to see a kid stumbling home with a penis entering his mouth. i know i have others but its 1:30 and i cant think…
I know someone who dropped their pants and took a funnel bare ass in front of the whole party. That was some funny shit. This year at sunset my buddy Jesse got caught jerking off too my girlfriend changing after spending the night getting smashed and swimming. She went into our room to change after swimming and when she finished she turned around to her surprise to see my buddy with his pants unzippered and penis exposed. As he is starring at her, hes jerking off fully erect and says to her, “hey baby do you wanna piece of this.” She begins to scream and everyone runs into the house and catches him with his pants down. Those are the two that come off the top of my head.
what the fuck are dudes thinking? “oh man he’s passed out lets take off our pants and touch our penisis together but it’s ok cause there’s a dude sleeping near us!”
not the funniest but the most recent. at like 6am everyone was pretty much passed out except for me and 1 other kid. so we went around and duct taped as many kids ankles together as we could. prolly got like 10 or so id say. 1 kid kept waking up while we were doing it and all he would say is “what the fuck?” then pass back out.
after that i got on one of the dirt bikes my buddy had and circled around this 1 tent for like 5 minutes pinned in 1st gear that a few people were sleeping in.
please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girlplease tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girlplease tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girlplease tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl please tell me that was a girl
omg those pics = worst post of the year omg omg omg do you guys have any clue how to trim any of that aside from that i think i am traumatized i just want to go huddle in a corner and cry Why did i look at that why did i look at that why did i look at that
Heres another…
Im in the OBX for senior week with like 35 of my other friends in one house. my one friend passes out, with pretty much every else still awake. bad idea. He trims his hair military style, probably less than a 1 on an electric razor and i colored his ENTIRE SCALP, EARS AND EYELIDS in with a magnum 44 marker while everyone else proceeded to draw on literally 99.9% of his body, the girls even wrote that he had a little penis, right above his little member. he literally did not move, passed out cold with no clothes on for at least 14 hours. i ended taking his Jergens hand lotion and using the stem from the top of the bottle and wiping what looked exactly like huge loads on his lips, cheeks, eyebrows, everything. and my one friend(a girl) eventually stuck it in his ass and it was the most hilarious thing i have ever seen in my entire life. I ALMOST WET MYSELF i was laughing so hard. i had to run into the bathroom in his room in like under 1 second.
it was a dick move, but he washed all of it off the next day, except for the inside of his ears, because he said he couldnt scrub them hard enough.
*****he had nothing but his shoes(thereason we tagged him) and a bathing suit on when he passed out
lol…like i sed…i was not there…THANK GOD… usually its not like that… usually theres no homosexual activity…usually i dont see my friends ass holes… but u gota admit…after the wtf factor, its pretty funny.
u dont have to worry bout thier sexuality tho… they get proly more girls than all of u…
was at a party this summer… i was 1st person there wasdrunk an hour later when only 3 peoplewere there(total of 15 came) i started doing front flips on the trampoline and then decided to go to the fridge to see what i could eat/drink… in front of the whole party i chugged A1 sauce followed by italion dressing topped off with maple syrup… then went and played beer pong lasted about 3min and threw up all over the table and my partner. i was then put into the bathroom to continue throwing up passed out and put my head through drywall in bathroom woke up with my head in the wall still and puke all over me
i cant really remember too many dumb things i’ve done while drunk… at the one party we put shaving cream all over this one kid, he woke up… tasted it, then went back to sleep. up at camp i was really drunk, i ran jumped off picnic tables and dove or flipped onto the ground, the next day i was pretty sore
the best for me was drinking to much soco… i proceeded to throw up in a small office sized garbage can which i then spilled on myself and the floor. then as i layed there with the spilled garbage can, i got stepped on numerous times by 2 girls fighting haha. someone somehow moved me to a chair, which was used by their dog to sleep on so there was tons of dog hair and stuff. the next morning i woke up in the dogs chair with hives all over me from an allergic reaction to the dog haha. such a quality night.
edit: another good story was when i was drunk im someones house and decided to make peanut butter and fluff sandwiches. but without bread… so i walked around hte party with a jar of peanut butter and a jar of fluff and a spoon eating and mixing them in the jars haha. and then proceeded to pee on their deck and pool.
heres a good one… at my friends house at school… havin a good time… campus cops are cool bout it but just want us to go inside, so we do. out of nowhere 2 random girls are havin a fit in the front lawn, one kid who owns the house sed they either need to come inside to leave. girls go, “u dont understand what i just went thru, dont tell me wat to do”… buddy goes…“i dont really give a shit, u need to leave.”…
then the girl proceeds to swing at my buddy, starts kickin his ass cuz he doesnt want to hit her, obviously. so then my buddys gf comes out to start with the girl, but the girl knocks her on her ass! then more people come out and the girls leave…
then they come back with about 2 guys. we tell them they gota leave. long story short, one of the girls starts beating up one of my other buddys sister. so my buddy jumps in, THROWS the girl across the yard LOL… and takes care of that. the girl ses big mistake, ill be back blah blah, and all the guys try to act tuff…(there were punches thrown but i cant remember the specifics)
round three… its about 2 in the morn and most of the people went to jims steak house. a black van rolls up, the door opens, and about 12 guys and the 2 girls get out. theres about 5 guys at the house now, and all the big ripped guys are gone lol. they come up …and of course my loud mouth drunk buddy goes and tries to start shit… then about 8 cop cars show up… BPD and canisius popo. theyre cool to my buddies, and kick the other people out…
i know i leaving good shit out…i just cant remember
it was a great night