[quote=“RedDawg,post:4,topic:28975"”]
Better faggot?
This past sunday i had to attend church for my g/f’s younger sisters communion.
Went out drinking the night before and my hangover wasn’t that bad until i was sitting in the hot church crammed into a pew.
I never go to church so watching all the chanting was keeping me entertained until the preist walked around tossing water on people.
It was shortly after that that the incredible urge to puke started coming.
I stood from the pew in the middle of a energetic chant and briskly walked to the bathroom.
As soon as i entered, the puke began flowing and when i was about 3 ft from the toilet it let loose, covering the floor, bowl, and tank of the toilet in puke and half digested pizza from my 3am snack the night before.
So now that i’m puking, i feel the post-draft beer shits starting to come.
So i spent 10 min switching between hovering over the bowl and unleashing hell from my ass and then bent over, pants around my ankles naked ass in the air puking into the bowl.
Finally my puking stopped, i laid down about 4" thick of toilet paper and continued shitting.
At this point a child and his father entered and the child remarked “what’s that smell?” the father responded with “someone is using the bathroom, shhhh” to which the child responded “it doesnt smell like poopie”.
They finally left, i finished up and quickly left to return to the pew as if nothing happened.
I feel like i should go to confession for defiling a church bathroom as much as i did that day.
[/quote]
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