IMHO this is your best bet. The paint is non toxic, Stains clothes, and makes an all out mess. If I was hit with one of these I would not come back.
But now you have to look at it from the eyes of an irrational teenager. You fucked up his clothes. What do you have that they are gonna fuck up? That sounds like the beginning of a war if you ask me. And I am not to sure what kids do these days. But when I was 16-18 we played mailbox baseball, baby oil the windshield, cut valve stems, super glued locks, and so on…