Porch Pirates / Package Thiefs

So I live downtown and my neighborhood has never really had a problem with porch pirates until COVID. They mostly stuck to Elmwood, etc. But I had my first one stolen a few weeks ago. Then today one tried it, but I chased him down and stole it back, lol.

Anyone else deal with this? And what’s your solution?

I’ve found two interesting products:

This lock: https://www.getboxlock.com/residential

And this box: https://www.theporchpod.com/ … But I’m not sure this company is alive anymore.

I’m not going to have my shit shipped to an Amazon drop point or other location because that’s lame.

I already have video but that doesn’t stop anyone. I’ll post the clips tomorrow. I’ve been putting them on Nextdoor and people on there are more upset about it than I am. :face_with_raised_eyebrow:


I have a dog that sounds like he’s 70lbs of muscle but in reality is a scared as shit corgi. Ring doorbell camera thing, and a note on my front door that tells the Amazon dipshits to put my packages in the mud room or in the back of my house.

But, guns works as well and are way more fun.

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OMG @Onyx_Z32 tell us about the confrontation! WTF happened

He chased him down and gave the dude his best Zoolander Blue Steel and dude just dropped the package and ran.


Here’s video.

This is the first one stolen a few weeks ago. Guy and girl team who often pan handle in the area. They’ve been seen all over recently, especially Elmwood: https://video.nest.com/clip/0319590bb57640cbb4f5935edc6114ae.mp4

This is the guy from yesterday:

Before swapping his hat, while casing the block: https://video.nest.com/clip/61b3620cee354df49373b6c575032a33.mp4

After swapping his hat (notice his shoes are the same):

Stealing package:

Me taking off after him. Note the sound of the sandals, lol:

@ubengineering I ran him down only a few houses away and yelled “Hey fuck face!” I was able to knock his bag / the package from his hand. He also dropped a pair of socks and an opened package. The opened package was from a few houses down and it had a fish tank pump stolen from it. No idea whos socks they are yet. He had several other items in his bag.

He said “I should knock you the fuck out” to which I just stood there for a moment then laughed at the irony. I started to walk home, but then got the police on the phone and followed him from a distance for about a block giving a description. He just fast walked away.

Unfortunately there isn’t anything the BPD can do about it because the city council has their hands tied. Even if he was arrested for larceny, the charges would be dropped because the city doesn’t want to prosecute these things. :man_shrugging:

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Like I said, guns.


You can bet your ass that they won’t be coming back to your house.

Also, although courageous, running after a random person who just committed a crime isn’t the smartest thing unless you are armed and prepared to handle a potentially violent situation. I would not recommend that.

That’s playing defense though.

The smart locks / boxes sound great in theory, but after reading all the reviews the biggest complaint is that the delivery services tend to not use them. So do I early-adopt and try to get them to use it? Or wait a while?

Oh that would never fly in the city. Like I said, they’re not even prosecuting larceny downtown anymore.

All the more reason to move. Fuck the City of Buffalo, and cities in general. This whole movement toward giving criminals a free pass is going to drive people away in droves.

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Fuck cities though, for real.

Unbelievable. Makes you want to knock the person out for stealing your packages to teach a lesson since the police aren’t doing a damn thing. However, you hit them, you know the police will come arrest you for Assault.
Sad because you have their faces on camera and proof of a crime, yet they do nothing.
Sounds like something you should pass off to the media. The amount of porch thieves right now around the city as well as surrounding towns is ridiculous right now. I see posts from the site Nextdoor.com all the time about this. I’d love to see the media call out the Mayor on this.
Doesn’t help they want to defund the police, during a time when they don’t even have enough officers or patrol cars available to answer these calls.


Fuck man what a piece of shit

Jokes aside, if you are going to confront anyone who attempts to steal your packages, you should be armed. Drawing a firearm on an individual is not recommended unless you feel your life is in immediate danger. In fact, you could be charged with aggrevated assault with a deadly weapon. Basic firearm safety says that unless you intend on pulling the trigger, the gun shouldn’t be pointed at someone.

That being said, if I were to chase down a subject that removed my property from my residence, I would recover said property in a manner that subdued the suspect in the most forceful manner without causing unnecessary harm.

@yamba6 yeah I’ve been posting the vids on Nextdoor. The post I started yesterday has started to devolve since I used “Hispanic” as his race. :taco:

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Legally, you would be fine pointing the gun at them, as long as you don’t shoot. It would fall under “physical force” but not be “deadly physical force” unless you shoot. At no point are you going to be ok if you shoot someone running away with your Amazon package.

§ 35.25 Justification; use of physical force to prevent or terminate larceny or criminal mischief.

A person may use physical force, other than deadly physical force, upon another person when and to the extent that he or she reasonably believes such to be necessary to prevent or terminate what he or she reasonably believes to be the commission or attempted commission by such other person of larceny or of criminal mischief with respect to property other than premises.

Now, should the dipshit decide they want to come at you with the gun drawn that would instantly shift the encounter from a larceny to an immediate and reasonable fear for your life (since if a physical struggle for the gun happens it’s a reasonable outcome that you could be killed). At that point justification for defense of a person comes in, where deadly force is allowed assuming you can’t retreat. If you’re still in your house the duty to retreat clause is not required.

Section 35.15 Justification; use of physical force in defense of a person

  1. A person may, subject to the provisions of subdivision two, use physical force upon another person when and to the extent he or she reasonably believes such to be necessary to defend himself, herself or a third person from what he or she reasonably believes to be the use or imminent use of unlawful physical force by such other person, unless:

(a) The latter’s conduct was provoked by the actor with intent to cause physical injury to another person; or

(b) The actor was the initial aggressor; except that in such case the use of physical force is nevertheless justifiable if the actor has withdrawn from the encounter and effectively communicated such withdrawal to such other person but the latter persists in continuing the incident by the use or threatened imminent use of unlawful physical force; or

© The physical force involved is the product of a combat by agreement not specifically authorized by law.

  1. A person may not use deadly physical force upon another person under circumstances specified in subdivision one unless:

(a) The actor reasonably believes that such other person is using or about to use deadly physical force. Even in such case, however, the actor may not use deadly physical force if he or she knows that with complete personal safety, to oneself and others he or she may avoid the necessity of so doing by retreating; except that the actor is under no duty to retreat if he or she is:

(i) in his or her dwelling and not the initial aggressor; or

(ii) a police officer or peace officer or a person assisting a police officer or a peace officer at the latter’s direction, acting pursuant to section 35.30; or

(b) He or she reasonably believes that such other person is committing or attempting to commit a kidnapping, forcible rape, forcible criminal sexual act or robbery; or

© He or she reasonably believes that such other person is committing or attempting to commit a burglary, and the circumstances are such that the use of deadly physical force is authorized by subdivision three of section 35.20.


Also, arson falls under the one property crime where deadly physical force is allowed even if you have no reasonable or immediate fear for your life… so maybe keep a drop lighter on you at all times. “Yeah officer, he stole my package and when I followed him he was trying to light this building on fire with that lighter next to his body with 10 of my bullets in it”.


josh im glad this turned out well but imho you should not be confronting people like this and cursing them out.

i probably would also confront them but probably would not call them names and just ask for my stuff back and ask them to please not take things from my property even though i know there is no consequenece for them in doing so.


So I’ve been trying to find a good box to put one of these on. But nothing is really that great and would take up too much of my porch. Now I’m looking for an insulated doggy door. My thought is I can mount it next to my door on the high side wall and deliveries can be pushed through and straight into the house.