This is why nice guys finish last, because cocky + funny is the ultimate character, plus it’s downright hilarious. :bowdown
I’ve been entertained by this character and his conversations with females for years and now I’m going to share some with you.
Girl1: but really, i need to find a rich husband
Girl1: thats my plan, isn’t that rude of me
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: sounds like a plan
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: just make sure he can afford a nice cabana boy
Girl1: haha oh i will
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: hahah
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: and yes, i am for hire
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: do i have to do any duties other than hot sex?
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: if so i require extra money
Girl1: woah free sex. no thats fine then
Girl1: that can be your only duty
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: i still require payment for the sex
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: but the old fart will pay so it ok
Girl1: oh yea good point
Girl1: then thats still fine
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: and am i still allowed to date or am i faithfull to my job
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: hahah
Girl1: well i will be married, so yea you can def date
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: alright im down for this job
Girl1: wrap it up though man
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: fo sho, i dont think the hubby would be to happy with little cabana children
Girl1: no he would not
Girl1: and he would stop repaying my college loans and we cannot have that
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: and he would stop paying me to have sex with his sexy wife. deff no good.
Girl1: so you’re saying you wouldnt do it without funding
Girl1: i guess thats understandable
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: no i must say i would gladly volunteer for this position
Girl1: hahaha
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: are you looking for volunteers by any chance?
Girl1: thats a rather skanky things to look for volunteers for
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: that is true
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: i didnt mean it like that though
Girl1: not yet, when i get a little older it wont be as skanky
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: well if you want i could take you for a few dates get ya some dinner and stuff
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: that way its all legit
Girl1: oh yea that would be really regit
: [color=red]TheMan[/color]: yes mam
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: you might even begin to like me some and than it would be sper legit
Girl1: such a racey conversation we are having this evening
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: if you like me than its not skanky, drunkness overrides skanky too
Girl1: hahaha… if only that were the case. you still feel skanky when the drunkness subsides
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: if you have feelings
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: when drunk and sober
Girl1: true true
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: than it super obliterates the skanky rule
[color=red]TheMan[/color] Girl1: yes i suppose it does
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: so youll justh ave to work at it
Girl1: haha righto
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: so sex it is. though this way i have to work for it much more than i would if i was just the cabana boy
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: and more expensive too
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: so when do you leave and does the real Lindsey come back to shoot me down?
Girl1: hahahaha
Girl1: when did i ever shoot you down
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: i dunno, but im sure your thinking about how to do it nicely
Girl1: no im not but il brb
Girl2: ya know what
Girl2: im gonna stop this nonsense
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: so…
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: i win?
Girl2: nope i win
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: your right
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: you become my friend
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: you do win
Girl2: there i sent it
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: winnar
Girl2: yeaaaaa i am a winnerr
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: yes, you get to look at my pictures again
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: course i havent accepted you yet
Girl2: haha ur sucha jerk
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: im still not accepting until you admit the your true feelings
Girl2: how bout you tell me your true feelings huh?
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: ask away
Girl2: haha how bad did u wanna do me the other day?
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: did i seem really drunk or just a lil bit?
Girl2: u didnt seem drunk
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: ah
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: i prolly didnt wanna do you than
Girl2:
Girl2: ouchhh
Girl2: if i wanted to fuck you then it woulda been WAY obvoius
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: i thought it was?
Girl2: and i do recall u askin ME to make out
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: i do recall making fun of you as i asked
Girl2: haha what did u say i dont even remember i was drunk
[color=red]TheMan[/color] (10:52:59 PM): [color=red]TheMan[/color]: i dont really remember, but you deff went with it
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: than i realized you were drunk and stopped you from making the greatest mistake of your life
Girl2: lol no i think i remember saying no i dont kiss jerks!
Girl2: and i think i remeber u wanted to hug me TWICE
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: i think you remember makin shit up
Girl2: haha i think i remember u telling me that u thoguht i was deadd sexy and that u wished i would follow u around
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: no no, i did mention something about your drool getting on my shoe though
Girl2: no no i spit on your shoe
Girl2: cuase i thoguth u were being really rude
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: oh
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: i thought i made you salivate
Girl2: haha idk what else u want me to say i think your good looking
Girl2: haha i dont get why ur tryina be an ass to me!
Girl2: cuase i know u can be nice
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: i like being an ass
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: i suck at being nice
Girl2: haha i thoguth u were cool at the party u were nice
Girl2: why are u bein an ass now?!
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: i was an ass than, you were jsut drunk
Girl2: haha i dont think you were
Girl2: when ar eu gonna accpet my request
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: admit the feelings and its accepted
Girl2: i said i thoguth uwere good looking idk what else u want me to say
Girl2: haha well i guess wahtevvvva floats ur boat
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: i dont actally have any boats
Girl2: haha i got one
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: rich bastard
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: maybe i am interested in you after all
Girl2:
Girl2: jerk
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: for saying i may now be interested or for calling you a bastard
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: lol
Girl2: calling me a bastard!
Girl2: and being interested cuase u think im rich!
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: nice. i hit on both
Girl2: haha why do u try to make memad!?
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: you give me compliments for some reason when your mad
[color=red]TheMan[/color]:
Girl2: haha i try to appease you!
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: thats quite the mistake
Girl2: haha idk what to do w you
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: do me works
Girl2: i dnt go around doin guys who are jerks to me
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: im nice in person apparently, no worries
Girl2: no no i come up to see those 27 year olds from Michaels
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: makes sense
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: i would too if i was a chick
Girl2: haha no im not a skank
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: are you saying i would be a skank?
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: eff you
Girl2: hah and i DONT do dirty things to boys who are mean to me
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: im nice sometimes
[color=red]TheMan[/color]:
Girl2: hah i dont think u said one nice
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: alright its time to get naked and hop in the shower
Girl2: haah try not to htink about me too much
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: does it count as nice if i say i may have trouble with that one?
Girl2: haha sadlyy that might be the nicest thing u have said all night
[color=red]TheMan[/color]: ill take that as ayes
All real identities are :ninja
Discuss.