Shortest time to fuck some skank?

I call bullshit

Last week…

Met a girl on facebook on Friday. Got along really well, then had her call me cuz I didn’t feel like being on the computer. Everything continued going well.

Saturday she texts me in the am and wanted to hang out. I said I was busy for the most part, but could do a late lunch. She’s down for it. We go to lunch, then get done and I bring her back to her car. Start making out, then she blows me. Sweet.

Later Saturday night after I’m drunk… I call her to the hotel I was staying at (friend’s gf’s bday, so we got two hotel rooms in Albany, and mine was just me in it). She comes over at 3am and calls me 5 times as I fell asleep. I wake up and open the door, she immediately starts taking her clothes off. We bang. She asks if she could sleep over, I say no because I’m not ready for her to meet my friends yet…

did u throw her $20 to leave? :lol

I wasent sure if I told that one, sorry. Here’s another.

AOL meetup, years ago. Normal bs, I’ll come over and watch a movie, whatever. Get there, and the apartment is DISGUSTING. BAD. I casually asked if she just moved in as there was boxes EVERYWHERE. I also remember birds flying around the place. I said fuck it, and fucked her as I felt as if I were in a zoo, hahahah.

Ok, another.

AOL meetup. I guess she was having problems with her BF, blah blah. One of the rare times that I brought the girl to my place (I normally like an escape route). Got to my place, and she freaks out that I have the SAME EXACT bed as she does, sans the Rick James Cheetah sheets. Fucked, Facialed, dropped off.

lmfao was her name jen?