Who else has stupid motherfuckers as family members? One of my uncles by marriage falls into this catagory. We’ve had quarrels over shit before which typically ending up with me walking away before his ass hits the floor and today was another one of those times. Quick background: he lives across the street from me. There is 3 houses in a row that my grandma owned. He is the middle one (we’re seperate from those 3). One is really old and delapidated and the other my gram lived in until recently. Well I keep my pickup in the garage at this house, and my uncle parks his semi outside beside the garage.
So today he comes over, I was sittin in the kitchen playing tetris and he knocked a few quick knocks and came in.
Immediately the first thing out of his mouth was “Do you have a paintball gun?”
me: “Not since I was about 13…”
him: “well did you shoot my truck with paintballs?” (at first I thought he meant his SIlverado)
me: “hahaha, I don’t have a paintball gun - no. Did they get your other trucks or my car?” (he has a pair of semis)
him: “No, just the semi by grams house”
me: “when did you notice it? I haven’t heard anything”
him: “You sure you didn’t do it? i know you used to shoot out the windows in the old house.”
Thats where I got pissed. I’m not too keen of being accused of shit I didn’t do. Not including the fact that it would have been 10+ years ago. THEN include the fact that it was his own son that shot out the windows. THEN include the face he was making and the tone he said it.
me: “I just said I didn’t fucking shoot your truck. Why in the hell would I? Not to mention my own truck is 10ft away. AND I NEVER FUCKING SHOT OUT ANY WINDOWS IN THE OLD HOUSE!”
at this point I got up and focused away from tetris and he musta realized I was pissed…
him: “I know you and your friends used to shoot those windows out!”
me: “You don’t know shit obviously. I didn’t shoot your truck, I didn’t shoot the old house, and so you know, it was your son and his dumb ass friends that shot out the windows with a .22. BYE!”
him: “ok, if you hear anything let me know…”
I know, I know… who gives a fuck…
[/rant]
