Stupid people today thread: sponsored by Xanax

Shift518 Automotive Shift518 Off Topic
21

Today. 8:00am, as soon as I get on the thruway and get up to speed, 78 to be exact. I look in my mirror and was like OHH FUCK… TROOPER. My heart sinks as I see those headlights approaching FAST. Motherfucker flys by me at around 90, I look just enough to catch a glimpse of the license plate…

KC5FD or some shit NYS ham radio operator plate… FUCKING HAMRADIO QUEER ASS I WISH I DIDNT LIVE IN MY PARENTS BASEMENT TALKING TO OTHER LOOSERS AND WAS ACTUALLY A REAL MAN AND BECAME A COP LIKE I TRY TO MAKE PEOPLE THINK I AM.

cock sucker, dark gray CrownVic, not even a PI, painted his easy pass orange to look like a trooper one, spot light on the a pillar and his hammi queer antenna on the trunk.

I kept doing 78-80 and caught him at the cluster fuck at 24, mean mugged him and thought to myself “you fucking poser”.

ahhhh, I feel better now.

22

Ham radio guys are the shit, step off :lol

23

fuck ham radios… put your electrical genius into building megasquirts! lol much better payoff IMO. :rofl

24

The fucking tard in the toyota camry who got in lane 7 (ezpass) with jersey plates at 24 in front of me who didn’t have an ezpass and proceeded to sit stopped at the toll booth not moving for a solid minute waiting fo someone to help them. Then looked back at me waiving their arms in angerly while I blared my horn at them and a line of cars formed behind me.

25

Should have yanked him out of the car, drove it 30 feet forward, got back in your car went through the booth and around him.

26

Well the stupid dog just shit where the old people can see, so I had to pick it up.

Awesome lol

Fuckin DragonLady

27

I had a guy yesterday but since this thread wasn’t up yesterday and this was completely bonkers ill tell it.

I have a second job mostly for shits and giggles and provides me endless amounts of entertainment. I’m working security screening at the airport manning the metal detector, which I absolutely despise because 85% of people at 4am are retarded even if during normal hours might have half a brain.

I have this guy with a business shirt that looked wrinkled as if it was previously tucked in.
“Sir, where are your pants” guy responds “I have medically replaced knees, I’m here so you can molest me”, I responded “Sir, I didn’t ask why you are here, I asked where are your pants”. He then began rambling that he had told the person loading bags that he need secondary screening due to medically replaced knees. She said that I should remove my belt as it will speed up the process (common becuase it would have been taken off during screening and scanned later any way) but I said it was going to go off becuase of my knee so I didnt want to take it off. She insisted so I removed my pants and put them through so I didnt have to remove the belt from the pants.

Here we stand in the middle of a crowded airport with this wiseass business man in a dress shirt, tie and tighty whitey’s with the biggest skid mark you could see it through his underwear.

Question for today: Do you think he was a scumbag reusing yesterday’s nasty underwear or do you think he woke up at 4am, got dressed, took a huge shit and managed to nasty up his underwear by 5am?

28

:rofl

29

:rofl:rofl:rofl:rofl

30

sir where are your pants?

Had me dieing!

31

:rofl

I’m mad at myself for eating an entire box of thin mint girl scout cookies before bed last night. I’ve been shitting uncontrollably for the past few hours.

32

LOL and rage this am. Schenectady on ramp for the thruway. as I approach the tolls, I see a tractor trailer, and 4 cars stopped infront of the EZPass booth… so I dont even hesitate and go right around to the 100% empty regular booth and hold up my EZpass. After it goes green look to my right and see 2 retards parked in the EZpass ONLY lane looking in the empty booth wondering why nobody is coming out to help!

I roll down the window lean over and ask “Is this the first time on the thruway??? or do you not know what the word ONLY means??? You in the ezpass ONLY lane holding up 10 cars behind you, pull the fuck over 10 feet ahead of you and go into that building and get a fucking ticket.”

then left and poped a pill. :thumbup

How is it EVERY day, I see this shit happen? honestly. How am I a fucking magnet for retards to flaunt what their most likely dumb fucking mother gave them? I need a dash cam and a web site.

33

I don’t see many retard drivers, you must be a magnet for that shit :lol

34

Actually they are supposed to keep driving and tell the exit toll booth bro dude. Its kinda like “Youre too dumb to read, so go play in traffic” deal lol

35

What are they teaching kids in school these days:

While playing Call of Duty Black Ops

“Yo, bro whats Berlin Wall? This place is mad armed son.” “I think its a church or something, ni99a. Why?”

WTF :rofl

36

HAHA! well aware of said trolls

37

damn son you get tight ALOT espically on the road

38

USPS:

Sent a part to someone 12 days ago, to NH (should have been there in 2-3 days max). Guy calls and asks where it is? I track it and its Missrouted:

Detailed Results:

-Missent, March 02, 2011, 10:03 am
-Out for Delivery, March 02, 2011, 10:00 am, FORT JOHNSON, NY 12070
-Sorting Complete, March 02, 2011, 9:50 am, FORT JOHNSON, NY 12070
-Arrival at Post Office, March 02, 2011, 7:29 am, FORT JOHNSON, NY 12070
-Processed through Sort Facility, February 28, 2011, 8:11 pm, SPRINGFIELD, MA 01152
-Processed through Sort Facility, February 27, 2011, 12:31 pm, ALBANY, NY 12288
-Processed through Sort Facility, February 26, 2011, 2:43 am, SPRINGFIELD, MA 01152
-Electronic Shipping Info Received, February 25, 2011

now looking at that it tells me it left NY, went half way to the destination and fucked up, then was headed back to me. Out for delivery on the 2nd sounds like its on a mail truck to my house… like EVERY package I ever sent or recieved looks like.

I call the customer service and run through automated shit answering the questions and getting nowhere, and being told many times “if your phone call is over, please hang up” what the fuck? I redialed twice and just yelled in the phone nonsense words, and got to a customer service person in a minute! lol

This chode just takes my number and reads off, word for word what i am looking at on my computer! I ask, if its out for delivery, 6 days ago… where the fuck is it getting delivered? Back to me? to the destination, about 4 hours from my house? It should have gotten there in less than 2-3 days, its 200 miles away! and last you and I see its “out for delivery” departing from my HOME TOWN! 6 DAYS AGO! I ask her what other useful information might you have for me? She said thats all I see online! “So your telling me, I call your place of business, asking for assistance to get to the bottom of YOUR BUSINESSES mistake, and you tell me what I already know off the same internet system everyone in the world can use??? There isnt anything internal to the fucking united states postal service that could be of assistance to you and I right now???” all I get is a no, I will document this and here is a reference number.

WHAT THE FUCK. one more reason the government blows, they cant even deliver a box correctly.

39

Dude

Shit happens

Chill pill time.

40

UPS/FedEx > *

I HATE the USPS. They take FOR EVER and their tracking systems are HORRIBLE.