:lol:
You’re talking to me all wrong. It’s, the wrong tone. Do it again, and I’ll stab you in the face with a soldering iron.
Christopher Walken, Joe Dirt
During a routine pull over.
“Show me how you suck a guy’s cock. Show me with your mouth! Show me with your mouth.”
Harvey Keitel - Bad Lieutenant
So many good quotes in “Casino”
Nicky Santoro: We’re supposed to be robbin’ this place, you dumb fuckin’ hebe.
Nicky Santoro: A lot of holes in the desert, and a lot of problems are buried in those holes. But you gotta do it right. I mean, you gotta have the hole already dug before you show up with a package in the trunk. Otherwise, you’re talking about a half-hour to forty-five minutes worth of digging. And who knows who’s gonna come along in that time? Pretty soon, you gotta dig a few more holes. You could be there all fuckin’ night.
Nicky Santoro: The coppers blamed me for every little thing out here, and I mean every little fuckin’ thing. If a guy fuckin’ slipped on a fuckin’ banana peel, they blamed me.
(One of the best)
Nicky Santoro: I think in all fairness, I should explain to you exactly what it is that I do. For instance tomorrow morning ill get up nice and early, take a walk down over to the bank and… walk in and see and uh… if you don’t have my money for me, I’ll… crack your fuckin’ head wide-open in front of everybody in the bank. And just about the time that I’m comin’ out of jail, hopefully, you’ll be coming out of your coma. And guess what? I’ll split your fuckin’ head open again. ‘Cause I’m fuckin’ stupid. I don’t give a fuck about jail. That’s my business. That’s what I do.
Nicky Santoro: Get this through your head you Jew motherfucker, you. You only exist out here because of me. That’s the only reason. Without me, you, personally, every fuckin’ wise guy skell around’ll take a piece of your fuckin’ Jew ass. Then where you gonna go? You’re fuckin’ warned. Don’t ever go over my fuckin’ head again. You motherfucker, you.
Here’s one from Goodfellas
Tommy DeVito: In this day and age, what the fuck is this world coming to? I can’t believe this, prejudice against - a Jew broad - prejudice against Italians.
Tommy DeVito: Sure, mom, I settle down with a nice girl every night, then I’m free the next morning.
Henry Hill: You’re a pistol, you’re really funny. You’re really funny.
Tommy DeVito: What do you mean I’m funny?
Henry Hill: It’s funny, you know. It’s a good story, it’s funny, you’re a funny guy. [laughs]
Tommy DeVito: what do you mean, you mean the way I talk? What?
Henry Hill: It’s just, you know. You’re just funny, it’s… funny, the way you tell the story and everything.
Tommy DeVito: [it becomes quiet] Funny how? What’s funny about it?
Anthony Stabile: Tommy no, You got it all wrong.
Tommy DeVito: Oh, oh, Anthony. He’s a big boy, he knows what he said. What did ya say? Funny how?
Henry Hill: Jus…
Tommy DeVito: What?
Henry Hill: Just… ya know… you’re funny.
Tommy DeVito: You mean, let me understand this cause, ya know maybe it’s me, I’m a little fucked up maybe, but I’m funny how, I mean funny like I’m a clown, I amuse you? I make you laugh, I’m here to fuckin’ amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?
Henry Hill: Just… you know, how you tell the story, what?
Tommy DeVito: No, no, I don’t know, you said it. How do I know? You said I’m funny. How the fuck am I funny, what the fuck is so funny about me? Tell me, tell me what’s funny!
Henry Hill: [long pause] Get the fuck out of here, Tommy!
Tommy DeVito: [everyone laughs] Ya motherfucker! I almost had him, I almost had him. Ya stuttering prick ya. Frankie, was he shaking? I wonder about you sometimes, Henry. You may fold under questioning.
thats an intro to an 88 fingers louie song, and it fucking pwns.
Get your nunchucks and your dad’s keys–I know where we can find a gun
“Toby… Toby? Toby? Toby Wong. Toby Wong? Toby Wong. Toby Chung? Fuckin’ Charlie Chan. I got Madonna’s big dick comin’ outta my left ear… and Toby the… I dunno what comin’ outta my right.”
somebody name that! best shit ever.
lol, beat me to it
try not to suck any dicks on your way threw the parking lot!
Keitel in Reservoir Dogs hahahha
YES!! i LOVE that part of that movie…eff it! i love that entire movie. brilliant and raw at the same time.
Fuck me? Fuck you! Fuck you and this whole city and everyone in it. Fuck the panhandlers, grubbing for money, and smiling at me behind my back. Fuck the squeegee men dirtying up the clean windshield of my car. Get a fucking job! Fuck the Sikhs and the Pakistanis bombing down the avenues in decrepit cabs, curry steaming out their pores, stinking up my day. Terrorists in fucking training. SLOW THE FUCK DOWN! Fuck the Chelsea boys with their waxed chests and pumped up biceps. Going down on each other in my parks and on my piers, jingling their dicks on my Channel 35. Fuck the Korean grocers with their pyramids of overpriced fruit and their tulips and roses wrapped in plastic. Ten years in the country, still no speaky English? Fuck the Russians in Brighton Beach. Mobster thugs sitting in cafés, sipping tea in little glasses, sugar cubes between their teeth. Wheelin’ and dealin’ and schemin’. Go back where you fucking came from! Fuck the black-hatted Chassidim, strolling up and down 47th street in their dirty gabardine with their dandruff. Selling South African apartheid diamonds! Fuck the Wall Street brokers. Self-styled masters of the universe. Michael Douglas, Gordon Gekko wannabe mother fuckers, figuring out new ways to rob hard working people blind. Send those Enron assholes to jail for FUCKING LIFE! You think Bush and Cheney didn’t know about that shit? Give me a fucking break! Tyco! Worldcom! Fuck the Puerto Ricans. 20 to a car, swelling up the welfare rolls, worst fuckin’ parade in the city. And don’t even get me started on the Dom-in-i-cans, ‘cause they make the Puerto Ricans look good. Fuck the Bensonhurst Italians with their pomaded hair, their nylon warm-up suits, their St. Anthony medallions, swinging their, Jason Giambi, Louisville slugger, baseball bats, trying to audition for the Sopranos. Fuck the Upper East Side wives with their Hermes scarves and their fifty-dollar Balducci artichokes. Overfed faces getting pulled and lifted and stretched, all taut and shiny. You’re not fooling anybody, sweetheart! Fuck the uptown brothers. They never pass the ball, they don’t want to play defense, they take five steps on every lay-up to the hoop. And then they want to turn around and blame everything on the white man. Slavery ended one hundred and thirty seven years ago. Move the fuck on! Fuck the corrupt cops with their anus violating plungers and their 41 shots, standing behind a blue wall of silence. You betray our trust! Fuck the priests who put their hands down some innocent child’s pants. Fuck the church that protects them, delivering us into evil. And while you’re at it, fuck JC! He got off easy! A day on the cross, a weekend in hell, and all the hallelujahs of the legioned angels for eternity! Try seven years in fuckin’ Otisville, J! Fuck Osama Bin Laden, Al Qaeda, and backward-ass, cave-dwelling, fundamentalist assholes everywhere. On the names of innocent thousands murdered, I pray you spend the rest of eternity with your seventy-two whores roasting in a jet-fuel fire in hell. You towel headed camel jockeys can kiss my royal Irish ass! Fuck Jacob Elinsky, whining malcontent. Fuck Francis Xavier Slaughtery my best friend, judging me while he stares at my girlfriend’s ass. Fuck Naturelle Riviera, I gave her my trust and she stabbed me in the back, sold me up the river, fucking bitch. Fuck my father with his endless grief, standing behind that bar sipping on club sodas, selling whisky to firemen, cheering the Bronx bombers. Fuck this whole city and everyone in it. From the row-houses of Astoria to the penthouses on Park Avenue, from the projects in the Bronx to the lofts in Soho. From the tenements in Alphabet City to the brownstones in Park slope to the split-levels in Staten Island. Let an earthquake crumble it, let the fires rage, let it burn to fucking ash and then let the waters rise and submerge this whole rat-infested place.
.
Bar Patron: Hey, hey. Yeah you, get up. What are you retarded? Get off the fucking car!
Raving Bitch: Hey dickless, get off the fucking car! Hey fucksuck, get your slippery fucking ass of the car! Listen to me, get off the fucking car with your fucking ass!
Parker: Shut that cunts mouth or I’ll come over there and fuckstart her head!
Raving Bitch: You’re gonna wish you never fucking got up this fucking morning asshole, because my boyfriend’s gonna fuck you up! And then after that while he’s fucking up your fucking gay uncle over there I’m gonna fucking cut off your cock and mail it to your mother, you fucking faggot bitch! You gaylord fucking bitch! How do you like that? You like that a lot you fucking faggot? You like to ass fuck? Fontanella fucking babyheads!
Bar Patron: Go ahead.
Raving Bitch: You like to fuck babyheads? You like to fuck boys? He’s gonna fuck you in the ass, how do you like that? He’s not even gay but he’ll do it just to fuck…
Bar Patron: Honey honey. She’s got a big mouth but she’s not kidding. I’m gonna whip you silly and I’m gonna fuck you stupid. You wanna do the man dance? First dance is yours.
ENGLISH MOTHA FUCKA, DO YOU SPEAK IT???
you could do better than that for pulp fiction…
try:
“That’s thirty minutes away. I’ll be there in ten.”
or
“Look, I’m not stupid. It’s the Big Man’s wife. I’m gonna sit across from her, chew my food with my mouth closed, laugh at her fucking jokes, and that’s it.”
Blazing Saddles
“that upitty nigger went and hit me on the head with a shovel, it would really mean alot to me if you could find it in the kindness of your heart to hang him for me”
Outlaw Josey Wales
“I’m gonna kick you so hard you’ll be wearing your ass for a hat!”
yea deff, but i hear it on shredd and reagan every morning at work, at its stuck in my head all the time, first thing i thought of
“dude…wheres my car? … Wheres your car dude…dude! wheres my car…uhhh…wheres your car dude”
I know kung fu!