Cougarspeed was directed to the east side by an angel where he found a golden keg. On this keg were the words of God transcribed in a language only Cougarspeed could understand. Using the mighty power of the LS1 translation device Cougarspeed translated the words and transcribed them into The Book of Beer. After completing the translation the golden keg was returned to the angel before anyone could see it because the angel was adamant about getting his deposit back. All worship the Book of Beer.
More people have died in the name of Christianity than in the name of Islam…
just sayin’ is all
Edit: can you make Bender from Futurama your Deity?
Beerontapology (Beer-on-tap-ology) noun: The belief in a higher power looking upon one self in the shape of Devine inebriation. Founded in 2010, this religion practices mostly at the 5 o’clock hour, when the masses flock to ones local watering-hole to seek forgiveness in the shape of fine incantations and bountiful women.
Beer. Fridays will be the sabbath. Instead of not being able to eat until sundown, you are not allowed to be sober until sunrise on Saturday.
WHAT A COINCIDENCE! THERE’S A BEER FEST THIS FRIDAY!
:bowdown: 
I think between Jay, Drew and I, we pretty much just made a new religion lol.
I’m in…
…so long as I still get to touch alter boys inappropriately
The holy grail is a pint glass. Munich is Mecca. Oktoberfest is Channuka. The multiple armed Hindu gods (Brahma, Durga, Ganesha) are all in because they can quadruple or even octuple fist.
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I think we just found the single truth underlying all religion. I knew enlightenment was at the bottom of a pint glass!
^this
So much win going on right now. But I now have to go to school. Night school IN THE SUMMER is a sin in this new religion btw.
:bigclap:
GAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH WHERE THE FUCK IS BIG CLAP?!?!?!?
The muslims build a church in NYC close to the World Trade center site and all we do is think of ways that we can drink beer. I think we win.
Glad someone know’s the history of Mormonism 
flying bison beer god?
Is JayS really JS and you’re the reincarnation of Joseph Smith? Only for beer?
some of you guys could not be this funny in person. i laugh much.
also, pureXTC promoted to Canadian.
What does that mean?
Demoted?
:lol: 
I’m way cooler in person.
<3
Sigh, let me re-phrase.
What does that mean? (serious question)
Did you mean to say “demoted”?