I appreciate your advice 
I’m still a very similar person to what I was back then ,when I did attend meets, Im just a slight bit more mature and a little less cocky. So I don’t know how my reception at events is going to be. Some members probably judged me before getting to know me but I know that stigma is still going to undoubtedly effect their opinion.
I have no one to go out with as of right now. When you hang out with your EX there is always a slight tension because of the past which kind of ruins the club, bar, going out to meet people scene.
I dont know. I wouldnt say that im whiny, depressed or thinking about the situation too much yet. I just finished my semester and I have 4 months with little to do ahead of me. I think that is what has this on my mind as much as it has been lately. Im not sure what the hell im going to do for the next 4 months. you can only wash and wax your car so many times. lol