Text this to all the girls you know for guarenteed sex

:rofl on this thread or the other?

THe bb.com one.

They always have epic posts over there.

OMG @ that DEATH picture. I just lost it laughing.

-Stallmer

I texted it to my gf and said “pics of me cheating on you got out, sorry.”

workin on it…

me: you know I’ve had a crush on you for years now?

her: is that so

me: yep

her: why did you decide to tell me this right nwo

me: not sure, why?

her: just thought it was random

me: oh
yeah im pretty random i guess

her: indeed

me: so what do you think… gonna run away with me or what

her: ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
maybe?

me: YES
NOT FOREVER ALONE
MAYBE

her: haha
were you serious thoug
about the crush thing
cuz that was flattering and if you took it back now id be sad

me: yeah of course

Strong work.

her: oh well thanks

me: yeah… no problem.

her: sorry im not sure what to say to that.
we had a thig once
*thing

me: yeah for a minute

her: yup… good times

me: yeah they were ok i guess
aha

her: oh… alright

me: borderline pretty good i guess…

her: haha well alright

me: jk… i miss those times
i was just thinking about them

her: why?

me: and i was feeling forever calzone
wow…
i mean alone
must be close to dinner time…

her: hahahaahahahaha
everytime i hear kings of leon i think of you for some reason
lol

haha… got forever calzone in there

Commence plowing.

LOL!

I’m fuxking crying lance

Lance is WINNING.

her: well… im sorry i kinda ended things way back when
i hope i didnt break ur heart too bad…

me: i have no heart
lettuce be real tea for a minute…

her: what

me: just a saying… but yea
its cool… you had better things going on
anyway
gotta run
when can we hang out

her: whenever youd like
remember when we started hanging out a lot and smoking *********? that was fun.

me: haha yea
lets do that again
im going to live near you real soon
so it’ll be easy
if you’re lucky i’ll show you my room

her: o im always lucky

1/1 so far

You must spread some reputation around before giving it to this god amongst men. Come on bro, you got tiger blood.

1/1.5 if you count kbizz

Lettuce be real, forever calzone and got the girl all in one. Winning.

im crying from that pic OMG :rofl

So confused :lol

not going so well… haha

me: did you know i’ve had a crush on you for years

her: shut up lancceee

me: wow… forever alone

her: lol wat??

me: i’ll be forever alone

her: me too

me: I JUST TOLD YOU I HAD A CRUSH ON YOU. NOW LET ME CLAP IT

her: omg
uncalled for
i want to be alone lol
duuuhhh

me: wow thanks
rather be forever trombone than with me
bs

:rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl omg im fucking dying.

her: lol waaattt??

me: i meant alone

her: oh hahaha
i just dont want men anymore
just drama
i’d rather be alone lol

me: so you’re a straight up dyke now
oh

her: haha you could say that

me: i don’t cause drama, i cause o faces

her: ew
whats wrong w you right now

me: nothing… just trying to tell this girl how i feel and im getting rejected hard
lettuce be reality here
you and i are like peanut jelly and butters

pjb reference… aww yea