The fight we had last night was my fault,
my wife asked me what was on the TV and i said dust.
Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door?
He wanted to win the No-bell prize.
Did you hear about the fire at the circus? It was intense.
Why did the boy blush when he opened the fridge?
He saw the salad DRESSING!
Have you heard about the new pirate movie, it’s rated arrr.
Why does Helen Keller play piano with one hand?
…because she sings with the other.
Why couldn’t Helen Keller scream when she fell off a mountain?
…because she was wearing mittens…
A pirate’s favorite gas is arrrrrrrrrrrrgon!
What did cinderella do when she got to the ball? Gag.
At a fine dining establishment a gentleman finds a fly in his soup. He calls the waiter over and asks “What is this fly doing in my soup?”
The waiter replies, “It looks like the backstroke to me sir.”
Did you hear about the strike at the US Mint? The workers are demanding to make less money.
what do you call a fish with no eyes…
fsh
Still among the best of all jokes I’ve ever heard.
Did you hear the one about the dyslexic agnostic? He didn’t care if there really is a dog.
bra >>>>>> dog
Dog = Bra?
why coulnt helen keller drive?
because shes a woman